


Opal

by lowkeyamen



Series: Solitaire [2]
Category: Topp Dogg (Band)
Genre: Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-07
Updated: 2017-01-04
Packaged: 2018-08-28 06:21:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 22,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8434936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lowkeyamen/pseuds/lowkeyamen
Summary: Jiho never believed in love at first sight, until he met Hojoon.





	1. Strip Club

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wasn't planning on posting this til next week but when i was drafting ao3 crashed and decided to post anyway so here u go i guess
> 
> btw opal takes place approx 3 years before turquoise

_opal; october_

_associated with desire, passion and sexuality; said to protect and help one overcome emotional turmoil._

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

"Hojoon! Room three, now!"

Hojoon inwardly groaned; he couldn't be bothered with this shit tonight. He was hoping to get through the rest of his shift hiding behind the bar so no one else would request him. He didn't even really care about the money at this point, he just wanted to go home and sleep. 

"How long for?" 

"Til 6am."

Hojoon blanched. This guy wanted him for five hours? This time he groaned out loud. What kind of creep would want a stripper for five hours?

"That's when I finish! Jesus Christ. He's gonna be fucking disgusting isn't he? Do you think if I threw myself down the stairs they'd let me go home?" 

Sehyuk shrugged, spraying a fine, shimmery mist over his abs to make them glisten in the dim lighting of the club. "Maybe if you die."  

Hojoon rolled his eyes, checking over his makeup in the mirror. Good enough, it'll do. He mentally psyched himself up for spending five whole hours with what he assumed to be some obese, sweaty middle aged man with a wife and kids at home who wanted way more than a lap dance. Hojoon was in no way against offering extra services, but he really was not in the mood to be sucking off old men tonight. 

"Ask Hoseok to bring me plenty of drinks throughout the night, I'm gonna need to be pretty pissed for this. Plus, I want someone to check I'm still alive."

He made his way down the deep purple hallway, stopping outside the third private room around the back of the club. He took a deep breath. Come on Hojoon, you can do this, game face. He put on the sultry façade he wore every night, masking his usual resting bitch face. 

He opened the door slinking into the gaudily decorated room, shutting it behind him. 

"Hi, sexy, I'm-"

There was no one there. Was this some kind of joke? For fucks sake. He really did not have the patience for Sehyuk's terrible banter tonight. 

"Hi."

"Jesus fucking Christ!" Hojoon jumped, eyes darting to the corner of the room nearest the door where a tall redhead stood. He corrected himself, remembering he was at work. "Sorry I...I didn't see you there."

The red haired man smiled, well, boy was probably more apt than man, he looked barely out of his teens, there was no way he was older than 21. He had at least 15cm on Hojoon; he was slim and had the most gorgeous eyesmile Hojoon had ever seen. He wasn't used to young, attractive men requesting his time. What was this guy doing wasting his money on a stripper?  _Oh god, maybe he really is a murderer._  

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, I was just looking at the art. There's some nice stuff in here." 

Hojoon quirked an eyebrow, ok so this guy wasn't an obese old creep, but he was weird. Who comes to a strip club to look at the art? Hojoon was sure none of his clients had even realised there were paintings on the walls. 

"Jiho." The redhead put his hand out for Hojoon to shake, which he took hesitantly. "Nice to meet you." 

"...Hojoon."

"Woah." The taller boy stepped closer to him, his lips parted. "You're even more beautiful up close." 

Hojoon felt his face heat up, mentally scalding himself. Hojoon doesn't blush. Ever. 

Jiho moved to sit on the red velvet chaise lounge, patting the space to his left, motioning for Hojoon to join him. 

"I saw you dancing before; I couldn't take my eyes off you." Jiho smiled as Hojoon settled down beside him. "You're breath-taking."

This was all so alien to the dancer. Sure guys complimented him, but not like this, it was usually more along the lines of  _'your lips are so pretty, I'd love to see them wrapped around my dick'_. Though, he wasn't sure he'd be too repulsed if Jiho did say that to him. 

Hojoon tried to distance himself from clients; that wasn't usually too difficult considering he hated most of them. But Jiho was...nice. He seemed genuine. Plus he was really, really fit. 

"Sorry if this seems creepy, me taking up your entire night. I dunno how much you usually make in a night, but I hope this will cover it. I just...didn't want anyone else to have you."

Jiho reached into his pocket and handed a cheque over to the stripper. Hojoon was used to having crumpled notes thrown at him, so it made a nice change.  _Jiho Shin_. Why did that name sound familiar? Wait...

_£1,500?_

Jiho was giving him £1,500? That was more than Hojoon made in a few weeks, never mind a night. He stared up at the redhead, mouth agape, eyebrows furrowed. He didn't know whether to be flattered or freaked out.  _Why was Jiho doing this?_

Jiho fretted; eyes wide. "Oh god, sorry, is that not enough? I can give you more. I don't want you miss out just because of me."

Hojoon was speechless. He would have usually jumped at the chance to bleed some idiot dry. But here Jiho was, offering him more money than Hojoon had ever had in his life and he didn't even hesitate to turn it down. 

"Wow, you've never been to a strip club before, huh? Listen kid, this is sweet, but I can't take this. I'm not worth anywhere near this much. I make like £200 a night tops." 

Jiho cocked his head, crimson locks falling into his eyes, a small  _'really?'_  leaving his lips. He blinked a couple of times, as if he was reconsidering his offer. Hojoon offered the cheque back to Jiho; no one was stupid enough to pay that much for him. He might ride dick like a pro but no one was that good. 

Jiho shook his head. "Take it; you're definitely worth more than that."

Hojoon shifted, he felt more uncomfortable in this situation than he did with an entire board of business men leering at him, taking advantage of the fact this particular club doesn't have a _'no touch'_  rule. This didn't feel right. He couldn't understand why anyone would do this for him. 

"What do you want from me?" Jiho must want him to do something...really messed up for this amount of money. Hojoon couldn't deny that he had let a fair few guys fuck him in this very room, but none had ever paid anywhere near this much. He only charged double for that guy who wanted to eat him out after fucking him. Which was...gross to say the least.  

Jiho's eyes shot open again.  _Wow this kid is skittish._  "I don't want to sleep with you or anything. Well...I mean; that's not why I'm paying you. I just want to...talk. I want to get to know you better. You really caught my attention, I think you're absolutely stunning, Hojoon." He fidgeted a little, playing with the bejewelled ring on his left hand, Hojoon found his nervous rambling kind of endearing. "And I meant it when I said I want you all to myself."

Hojoon could hear a smirk in Jiho's voice even though the redhead had the most adorable smile on his face. The fact that Jiho wasn't paying to fuck him made Hojoon want Jiho to fuck him. He could tell that's what the taller boy wanted, but he thought it was sweet Jiho was actually treating him like a person instead of an object. 

He bit his lip, turning to face Jiho, fingers ghosting over the redhead’s thigh. His cocky demeanour returning now he knew Jiho's intentions, and he believed him. Who would pay that much for a whore just to lie about not wanting to sleep with him? For that amount of money Hojoon was at his beck and call, but Jiho genuinely seemed to just want to talk. For now anyway. 

"You don't have to hold back, darling." Hojoon purred. "It's really, really sweet that you don't want to take advantage of me, but you're so hot, I'd let you fuck me for free." 

Jiho's breath hitched as Hojoon closed in on him, their lips grazing against one another's as the dancer spoke. Jiho would be lying if he said he didn't want to sleep with Hojoon. But he wanted more than that. He didn't just want to use the tiny boy and throw him away after like some cheap sex doll. He wanted Hojoon. And he  _wanted_  Hojoon to want him back. 

Jiho laughed lowly against Hojoon's lips, catching them in a tender kiss. "Trust me, Princess, there's nothing I'd like more than to pin you against that wall and fuck you 'til you can't scream my name anymore." Jiho whispered sending chills down Hojoon's spine via the commanding tone in his voice before pulling back, his signature bright white smile beaming down at Hojoon. "But maybe another time, I really do want to get to know you better." 

Hojoon was stunned to silence, guys don't treat him like this, he didn't know how to react. This was so foreign to him. 

"You do know how places like this work, right? You know what I do for a living?" He couldn't understand why Jiho would want to get to know someone like him better. He didn't have to put in all the legwork of wooing someone to get him into bed. It was Hojoon's job to cut straight to the point and give him everything he wanted. 

"Sure I do, but I don't want you to sleep with me because I'm paying you, I want you to want to sleep with me. Really want it." Hojoon already wanted it, he rarely got guys as attractive as Jiho in and the fact that Jiho was holding back made the elder want him even more. 

"Treat this as a date. In a..." Jiho surveyed the area around him, all velvet, burgundy, gold and violet and fairly tasteless art. "...tacky, Moulin Rouge themed cafe or something." 

Hojoon laughed, was this kid for real? He had met a lot of weird clients in his time working here, but Jiho was something else. 

"I don't really do dates." 

Jiho smirked, his eyes shining in the dim lighting. "Well, I've paid for your company for the evening, so tonight you do." 

Hojoon's felt his stomach knot, he could sense Jiho had a darker side to him, that the younger could probably fuck him better than anyone had before. He didn't know why but he wanted to unlock that. He wanted Jiho to control him. He wasn't sure how he felt about having to work for it though. 

He slipped back into his sultry persona, if Jiho wanted a date with a stripper, then that's what he was going to get. "Okay then baby, tell me about yourself." Hojoon rang the bar, asking Hoseok to bring them some drinks. They were going to be here a while, after all.

Jiho's face lit up, Hojoon really didn't understand this kid. 

"Well, my name's Jiho, I'm twenty, I was born and raised here in London and I'm a model. I want to break into acting some time though, standing there looking pretty can get kinda boring."

Hojoon snorted.  _Tell me about it_. "So if you're a model, what are you doing in a place like this? Surely you can get anyone you want." 

Jiho hummed. "I was out for a friend's birthday, he dragged me here. I was just about to go home, but then I saw you, and...I just had to have you."

Hojoon felt butterflies in his stomach, or at least he thought that's what it was. Butterflies or nausea. Probably nausea. No, definitely nausea, Hojoon didn't get butterflies. Ever. 

He gave in, giving Jiho the 'date' he wanted, he figured it was better than dealing with any other clients. He didn't have to do much but sit around, drink and listen to Jiho. 

He couldn't deny he was attracted to the younger, and there was something about Jiho that made him smile. He was so vibrant and full of life. Hojoon couldn't believe someone with such an infectious smile and personality could be single, or paying to spend time with someone like him. 

Jiho laughed, sitting back against the chaise lounge. "My boyfriend's gonna kill me, I told him I wouldn't be back late."

The butterflies stopped. Jiho was just like the rest of them. Hojoon had no problem with being the other man, or woman, whatever they wanted him to be. He wasn't the one cheating. But that didn't mean he agreed with it. He resented every single one of his regular clients that were in a relationship. Looks like Jiho was just going to be added to that list. 

"Wait. So you're a model, and you have a boyfriend, yet you've paid to sit here and talk to some hooker?" 

Jiho looked past Hojoon, at the wall behind him, a contemplative expression on his face. Maybe he was realising how ridiculous this all was and Hojoon could just take the money and go back to standing around doing nothing. 

"Two."

"What?"

"I have two boyfriends."

Hojoon's jaw dropped. So Jiho was cheating on his boyfriend with someone else and now trying to get with some prostitute? It was his job not to judge people though, not aloud anyway. 

"We live together. They're adorable, look." Jiho unlocked his phone to show Hojoon his homescreen; a picture of two boys. A blonde with a huge catlike smile on his face as a brunette with unusually high cheekbones kissed his temple. 

"You're all together? Like...all three of you?"

Jiho nodded, smiling down at his phone as he remembered the day he took that picture. "Yeah, I don't believe that love is made for just two people. Love is like this huge thing, I don't understand why there are meant to be limits on it, you know? I think that a lot of people are capable of loving more than just one person; I truly believe that's why so many relationships don't last. I don't think humans are meant to be monogamous, I think we should be allowed to love as many people as we want."

Hojoon blinked. He didn't know how to respond to that. He had never been in love before, never even been close to being in love. He had no interest in boyfriends or relationships beyond meaningless sex. He was happy just to get fucked by a guy and leave. Even staying the night was usually too much of a commitment for him. 

"Don't they get jealous?"

Jiho shook his head. "Not really. It just works for us; we don't get jealous because we know we all love each other."

"Would they be jealous that you're here? Paying to spend time with some hooker while they're at home?" Hojoon took a sip of his drink, eyes fixed on Jiho as the younger's jaw dropped slightly at the word  _'hooker'_.

"Nah, they have each other. They know I love meeting new people, they'd understand. Your profession makes absolutely no difference."

Jiho took a sip from his own drink. Hojoon couldn't believe how nonchalant the redhead was being about all of this. It was truly like he was sat in a cafe just having a casual chat with a friend he hasn't seen in a while, as opposed to drinking badly made cocktails in a shady strip club with a stripper-cum-prostitute. Jiho was treating him like a person, like he saw the real Hojoon, past all the layers of makeup and glitter. 

"You really don't care that I let people fuck me for money?"

Jiho hummed, tilting his head slightly. "Well no, not if that's what you want to do. Unless you're being forced into it. Then I'd mind." His dark eyes locked with Hojoon's, the elder shrinking slightly under his gaze. It was as if Jiho could see straight through him. As if he knew exactly what was going through Hojoon's mind. 

The blonde faltered, sitting up straighter to give off the illusion of confidence. "Sucking dick is what I do best, Jiho." He laughed lowly, picking up his infamous provocative facade. "Maybe one day you'll find out just how good I am."

Jiho's face flushed. Hojoon loved the effect he had on guys. He knew how sexy he was, he knew that making men want him was something he could do effortlessly. He may not like sleeping with people for money as much as he made out, but it had been his only option for a while now, and it was something he had come to terms with. Plus, he really was great at sucking dick. 

"What's your dream job?"

"Uh..." He had just offered to blow this guy and he was asking him about his aspirations? "I've never really thought about it."

"Oh, come on. What did you want to be when you were younger?"

Hojoon thought. He couldn't remember much from when he was younger; he had blocked most of it out. "A dancer...so I guess this is the closest I'm gonna get to that. Or maybe, like, a choreographer. That could be fun."

Jiho smiled softly. "I've only seen you dance once and, well, you blew my mind so I think you'd be amazing at either of those things."

Hojoon blushed lightly, hoping to God that Jiho wouldn't be able to tell under all the makeup and in the dim lighting of the room. Even though they had just met, it was as if Jiho believed in him, believed he could be more than this. Hojoon was fairly certain that wasn't true, that he would never amount to anything more than just a cheap whore. But it felt nice that someone believed he could. 

"Hey, would you mind if I came back another night? I'd pay you again, obviously, but I really like hanging out with you. Plus you look like you could use a break from all the creeps you must get. I saw the way some of them were looking at you out there. It made me feel kinda sick."

"You really want to pay just to spend time with me?"

Jiho beamed. His teeth were so white and straight, Hojoon was dazzled by them every time the younger opened his mouth. "Of course I do, I really like you Hojoon, and I really do want to get to know you better." He leaned closer to the blonde, eyes darkening. "You know, if you do wanna hook up some time. I guarantee I could fuck you better than any guy that's been in here."

Hojoon's breath hitched, he _knew_ Jiho had another side to him. A darker, animalistic side. He knew the redhead wanted him, but he was holding himself back. He wanted more than just sex. 

Hojoon caught Jiho's lips in his own as the younger began to pull away, teeth digging into the soft pink skin of the model's lower lip. 

"I hope you're not gonna tease me like this every week, Jiho."

Jiho giggled as he pulled back; slurping on his straw to get the last few drops of his cocktail. 

"We'll see how I feel, Princess."

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Jiho kept his promise; he continued to buy Hojoon's time, the two of them spending hours in the back room of the sketchy club. 

Hojoon started to look forward to Jiho coming to visit him. It meant he didn't have to actually do any work or have any creepy men invading his personal space; but he actually enjoyed Jiho's company. Not that he would admit it to the younger. 

Jiho was unlike anyone he had ever met. He was so bright and positive, something Hojoon didn't see often. It was refreshing. Hojoon was a pessimist, happy people tended to piss him off, but for some reason Jiho didn't. Hojoon actually felt uplifted whenever the younger came to visit him, he was a welcome distraction from the blonde's shitty life. 

"You know what I just realised?" Jiho looked up at Hojoon. He was laid out on the chaise lounge, his head in Hojoon's lap as the elder played with his burgundy hair. "Since I've paid to have you all night, I should be able to take you out, right?"

"Out where?"

Jiho shrugged. "I dunno, anywhere. I'm sick of looking at this room. I want to take you somewhere nice."

"Jiho, you already spend enough on me, I'd be happy with McDonald's or Nando's to be honest." The blonde laughed softly as he plaited Jiho's hair. 

Jiho grinned, sitting up and taking Hojoon's hand in his, leading the elder to the door, grabbing his jacket on the way. 

"Hojoon, where the fuck do you think you're going?" A tall, dark man covered in tattoos was leaning against the doorway as the blonde collected his belongings. 

"Jiho's taking me out. He's paid for me for the entire night so, technically, I don't have to be here." 

"That's not how this works. I'm not letting my best whore take a night off."

Hojoon inhaled deeply as he put his jacket on, turning to face his boss. "I'm not taking the night off, Jiwon. Jiho wants to take me out; I'm just giving my client what he wants. He has me for the night so it's not like I'm going to be making money off anyone else." 

He shoved his phone in his pocket, squeezing past Jiwon to go find Jiho. 

Calloused fingers grabbed his wrist, slamming him into the doorframe. Hojoon whimpered as the back of his head made contact with ridged wood. 

"I don't like how much time he's spending with you." Jiwon growled into Hojoon's ear. 

The younger tried to squirm out of Jiwon's grasp, causing the taller man to tighten his grip. "Jiwon, you're hurting me." His voice was wavering. 

"Just remember who it is you belong to." His teeth grazed Hojoon's jawline, free hand roughly grabbing the blonde's face, forcing him into a rough kiss. "Now go make me some money like a good little slut." 

Jiwon let go of Hojoon with a slight push, the smaller boy losing his balance slightly. He pulled his jacket tighter around himself as he made his way out of the building, wiping away tears that threatened to fall with his sleeve. He wasn't crying.  _You don't cry, Hojoon._  His eyes just happened to have tears in them. 

"Hey...you okay?" Jiho approached Hojoon; concern lacing his voice was he noticed the way the blonde was curled in on himself. 

"No, yeah, I'm fine." He fidgeted slightly. "Can we just go?"

Jiho nodded, knowing something wasn't right but not wanting to push it. He intertwined his fingers with Hojoon's, frowning at the way the blonde flinched slightly at the contact before wrapping himself around Jiho's arm. Hojoon wasn't big on human contact, but Jiho made him feel safe, and that's exactly what he needed right now. 

They walked in silence to a nearby fast food restaurant, Jiho gesturing for the elder to find a table as he went to order. 

"Are you sure you're okay?" Jiho asked as he sat down opposite the blonde with a tray of food. Hojoon could see the worry in his eyes. 

He nodded his head. Talking had never been Hojoon's strong point, he was better with actions than words. He didn't really open up to anyone, ever. He dealt with things in his own way. Usually by bottling them up. 

The fake smile he was so used to wearing slipped back into his face. He still had a client to please, after all. "I'm fine, just happy to be out of there. You look even better in proper lighting." 

He picked a fry off the tray between them, smirking as a pale pink blush crept into Jiho's cheeks. 

"What happened to your wrist?" 

Hojoon froze, realising the sleeve of his jacket had rolled down as he ate, revealing the red mark on his slim wrist. 

"Nothing."

Jiho's eyebrows furrowed. "Hojoon."

"It's nothing." He pulled his sleeve down, subconsciously wrapping his arms around himself. 

"Did someone hurt you?"

"I said its nothing, Jiho. Just drop it." He hissed, averting eye contact with the younger. 

The redhead shifted his chair round so he was sitting adjacent to the dancer. "You can talk to me, Hojoon." He gently palmed Hojoon's knee, reassuring the elder that he was there for him. 

He hated this. Jiho was way too nice to him, he didn't deserve it. He knew what Jiwon wanted him to do, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He had to let Jiho go. 

"I don't want to." He looked up at Jiho, eyes glassy. "You're just a client, Jiho, that's it. I can't do this anymore; I can't keep taking your money." 

He reached into his pocket to hand his cheque for the night back to Jiho. "I'm sorry. You're too good for this, Jiho. Go back to your boyfriends." 

He pressed a soft kiss to Jiho's forehead before standing to leave and making his way out onto the street. He could feel the tears starting to resurface. Jiho had been the only good thing in his life, which was pathetic really, he had only known the guy a few weeks and he paid to spend time with him. 

"Hojoon! Wait!"

He sped up, hoping Jiho would get the message and just leave him alone. He couldn't understand why the younger would want anything to do with him. 

"Hojoon! Please." Jiho ran in front of him, causing the blonde to stop abruptly, his eyes trained on the ground. "At least let me take you home, so I know you get back safe." 

He shook his head. Tears began to slip down his face. "Jiho, stop being so nice to me." His voice cracked. This wasn't happening. He didn't cry. Especially not in front of people. "Just forget about me."

"I can't." Jiho pulled him into a tight hug, Hojoon sobbing harder as his cheek made contact with Jiho's sweater. "I can't stop thinking about you; I'm not letting you go that easily." 

He pressed a soft kiss to blonde hair as he rocked the elder back and forth, déjà vu hitting him. Jiho had never given up on anyone before. He hadn't given up on Taeyang and he wasn't about to give up on Hojoon. He knew the elder was hiding something from him, something painful, and he wanted to help. He wanted to protect Hojoon from whatever this was. 

"You're coming home with me tonight, okay? I can't leave you alone when you're this upset." 

Hojoon wanted to protest. He was no good, and the last thing he wanted was for Jiho to get caught up in his shit. But somehow, instead, his arms ended up wrapped around Jiho's waist, nodding softly as he nuzzled into the younger's chest. He knew this was a terrible idea, but he needed Jiho. Just for tonight he needed someone who cared about him. 

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Hojoon woke up with a pair of arms wrapped around his waist. That wasn't something he was used to, especially without sex being involved the night before. He liked it. He felt safe. He could get used to this. 

No. He couldn't. 

He had to leave. He was meant to be cutting Jiho out not snuggling up in bed with him. 

He lifted the younger's arm slowly, sliding out from his space, nestled into Jiho's chest, instantly missing the warmth. He undressed and redressed quietly, leaving the clothes Jiho had let him sleep in in a neat pile on the end of the bed. 

He didn't want to walk out in the redhead. He hated the thought of him waking up alone, but he couldn't keep taking his money and leading him on like this. 

He stole one last glance of Jiho's sleeping form before exiting the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. 

"You must be Hojoon."

He froze. A brunette boy around the same age as him, if not younger was sat on the kitchen bench, cigarette in hand. 

"Taeyang. Jiho's boyfriend." He offered as he blew smoke out of the open window next to him. "Does he know you're leaving? Jiho is rarely up before 10."

Hojoon clearly had guilt written all over his face as his eyes trailed down to the sleeves of his jacket. He wanted to leave but he felt like he couldn't move under Taeyang's gaze. 

"If you don't like him, you have to be up front with him. When Jiho falls for someone; he falls hard." The brunette flicked some of the ash of his cigarette out of the window. "And if you break his heart, I'm afraid I'll have to break your nose. Which would be a shame, because you're gorgeous. I can see why he's so enamoured with you."

Hojoon flinched slightly at the threat; it wasn't the first time he had heard that. "I... He deserves better than me. I'm no good for him."

Taeyang laughed softly, throwing the used cigarette butt out of the window and jumping down off the bench. He was shorter than Hojoon had expected. 

"You sound like me when I was younger." He crossed the room to sit on the sofa in their tiny open-plan apartment, motioning for Hojoon to join him. "I thought the exact same thing. I didn't want him to be with me because I thought he deserved better. I thought I would ruin him or something."

He took a hold of Hojoon's hand as the younger sat next to him, instantly noticing the red mark on his wrist. "But Jiho lives to help people; he would never give up on anyone. If he thinks you're good enough for him, then you are. He's actually very stubborn like that."

His thumb ghosted over the bruise that had begun to form on Hojoon's wrist, pushing the dancer's coat up slightly to reveal a number of faded bruises up his forearm. Hojoon pulled his arm back as if he had been burned by Taeyang's touch. 

"Let him help you, Hojoon. By the looks of things you're the one that deserves better." 


	2. Strip Club

He stayed. 

He didn't know why Taeyang's words had such an effect on him; but they did. He knew he should let Jiho go, that it would be selfish to get him tangled up in the mess that was his life. But he couldn't do it. He couldn't just leave. 

He changed back into the clothes Jiho had given him, climbing back into bed with the younger as if nothing had happened. 

Jiho stirred as Hojoon settled back into his side. Blinking down at the blonde a few times before that dazzling smile cracked onto his face. 

"Hey, you."

Hojoon smiled back, meekly. "Hi."

Jiho stretched, gesturing for Hojoon to cuddle closer into him, wrapping his arms tightly around the elder. "How you feeling?"

Hojoon nuzzled his face into Jiho's bare chest. He smelled like lavender and jasmine. "Better. Thanks." 

Jiho hadn’t pushed anything last night, letting Hojoon calm down and get some rest. But the dancer knew it was coming. The questions. Taeyang seemed to know from personal experience that Jiho wouldn't just let this drop. That he wouldn't just let Hojoon go back to his normal life. Maybe Jiho really could help him. 

"Hojoon." He pressed a soft kiss into blonde hair. "I'm worried about you. When you were getting changed last night I noticed... You're covered in bruises, Hojoon. Who is doing this to you? Is it your family? Or a boyfriend?"

He tensed up in Jiho's arms. He couldn't tell him the truth. 

"I don't have a family." He replied, shaking his head. "Or a boyfriend." Not technically a lie; Jiwon was in no way his boyfriend. "Some clients just have no boundaries, that's all. It's not a big deal." 

"Anyone hurting you in any way is a massive deal, babe. You shouldn't have to go through that. Can't your manager stop shit like that?"

Hojoon snorted. Even if it was overweight business men getting extra-handsy, Jiwon wouldn't give a fuck. "He doesn't care as long as I'm making him money." 

He wanted Jiho to stop asking questions, he wasn't ready to open up just yet, though. He needed to change the subject. 

"Jiho?" The model hummed, rubbing soothing circles in to Hojoon's back. "How come you haven't made a move on me yet?"

Jiho laughed under his breath. "You're gonna think this is stupid, but I wanted our first time to be special. That's why I asked if you wanted to go out, I was gonna take you to a nice hotel sometime." 

"I thought I told you to stop spending money on me."

Jiho rolled his eyes slightly. "I like spending money on you. I just didn't want the memory of us first sleeping together to be in that shady club."

Memory? Jiho really thought something was going to come of this didn't he? Maybe Taeyang was right, he should just let Jiho down gently now before he got in way too deep. Hojoon didn't do boyfriends. Even if he wanted to, Jiwon would never allow that. 

But he wanted Jiho so bad. He wanted to know what it was like to sleep with someone that cares about him, that didn't just see him as an object. It was selfish, but he needed that right now. 

"Maybe it doesn't have to be." He caught Jiho's lips in his own, fingers trailing down the length of his bare torso, stopping just before the waistband of his boxers. "I think this place is pretty special." 

"Are you sure this is what you want?"

Hojoon nodded, pressing a wet kiss to Jiho's sternum. "I've wanted this since the day we first met, Jiho. I need to know how it feels to be with someone that cares about me like you do. I've never had that before."

A sad smile broke into Jiho's face. He hated how little Hojoon thought of himself, but he was determined to change that. 

He slowly lifted the oversized t-shirt he had given Hojoon the night before off the smaller boy, his eyes instantly fixing on the bruises on the blonde's arms and shoulders. He noticed how uncomfortable Hojoon felt under his gaze, kissing the dancer to relieve some of the tension. 

He repositioned Hojoon so he was lying back on the bed, Jiho above him. The redhead broke the kiss, sitting back so he could look at the blonde underneath him. 

"I wish you knew how beautiful you are, Hojoon." He brought the smaller boy's hand up to his lips, laying soft kisses over every single mark on his right arm. "I wish you could see your worth."

Hojoon wrapped his arms around Jiho's neck, pulling him into a deep kiss. No one had ever spoken to him like that before. No one had ever treated him as something of value. His heart swelled even as Jiho's hands found their way to the waistband of his borrowed sweatpants. Jiho didn't just want him for his body; he didn't just want a quick fuck from some whore. He wanted Hojoon. 

Jiho hooked his thumbs in the grey jersey, pulling the sweatpants down from Hojoon's hips. He left a trail of kisses down the elders torso, Hojoon's back arching into the touch. 

"Hojoon..." Jiho stopped as he reached the dancers hips, pulling back to take in the discolouration on the elders inner thighs. The more than obvious thumb print shaped bruises  

Hojoon swallowed thickly. 

"Jiho, just...pretend they're not there. For now. Please." He laced his fingers with Jiho's, pulling the younger back down on top of him, shifting his gaze from the marks on his pale skin. "I need this."

Tears began to prick his eyes again; he wasn't used to being this emotional. He didn't like it. He needed Jiho to understand how much the needed the younger right now. He wanted to lose himself in the redhead, forget about everything, even if it was just for a short while. 

Jiho pressed a chaste kiss to his lips, Hojoon's fingers burying in his hair in an attempt to deepen it, but Jiho pulled away before giving him any real contact. 

"I'm sorry, Hojoon. I can't do this while you're so upset. I don't want to take advantage of you." He rolled off the dancer, sitting cross-legged on the bed next to him as he stroked through blonde hair. "I know you think this will make you feel better, but it won't. I want to help you, Hojoon, but not like this."

Hojoon sat up to face the younger. "Jiho, please. I need you." He knew how desperate he sounded, tears threatening to spill. But he wanted this so bad. "Please...just fuck me. I need to know someone cares about me."

Jiho sighed, wiping a stray tear from Hojoon's round cheek. "I do care about you. That's why I can't do this. You're too fragile right now."

_Fragile? Fucking fragile?_

He slapped Jiho's hand away from his face, eyebrows furrowed. "You don't know anything about me, Jiho. The last thing I am is fucking  _fragile_. You don't know half the shit I've been through." 

He stood, pulling the sweatpants back up and throwing on the shirt he had slept in before grabbing his jacket and shoes. He didn't even bother collecting the clothes he had come in, he just needed to get out of here. Now. 

"Fuck this." He opened the door of Jiho's bedroom to leave. "If you won't fuck me, there are plenty of other guys out there that will." 

He slammed the door, storming through the open-plan apartment, not even acknowledging Taeyang and Hansol in the living room. 

"What's his problem?" Hansol whispered to his boyfriend; Taeyang shushing him as his eyes followed the blonde. 

"Hojoon, wait! Please, you can't do this!" Jiho burst out of his room, running after the dancer; his boyfriends watching in silence from the sofa. 

"Just leave me the fuck alone." Hojoon stopped at the front door, turning to face the taller boy. "You don't get any say in how I live my life. You're just some loser that fucking pays to spend time with me." His voice cracked as the tears streamed down his face. "Goodbye, Jiho." 

Jiho raked his hands through his crimson hair, his own tears starting to spill. He thought he was doing the right things by turning Hojoon down, he didn't feel comfortable sleeping with the dancer when it was so clear someone, or some people, were abusing him. He hadn't expected him to take off like that though. He didn't want him to go find solace in some random guy’s bed. Someone who would just treat him like the rest do. 

"Jii, you need to go after him."

He turned to see his two boyfriends standing behind them, their faces awash with worry. He nodded, running back to his room to throw on some clothes before leaving, hoping to catch the blonde. 

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Hojoon woke up with a pair of arms wrapped around his waist. He could definitely get used to this. He smiled to himself, shuffling back into the warmth of Jiho's body. 

His eyes snapped open. That wasn't Jiho. His head was pounding, his throat was dry and he was completely disorientated. He had no idea where he was. This room didn't look familiar at all. 

He turned to look at the sleeping body next to him _. Oh, Jesus. Who the fuck was this?_

He groaned, getting out of the bed and collecting his, well, Jiho's, clothes. There was no way he was staying here for this guy to wake up. 

He pulled the over-sized tee over his head.  _Lavender and jasmine_. He let his eyes fall shut, inhaling the scent that reminded him so much of the younger. 

He winced at the pain in his lower back as he moved to leave wherever he was, checking his phone as he rushed out of the building. 

12 messages and 8 missed calls from Jiho. 

His heart ached slightly. He had been such a dick to him, Jiho only wanted to help. He should have stayed. Then he wouldn't have ended up here. Not that he had any idea where he was. 

His thumb hovered over the notification. It was almost midnight, he couldn't phone Jiho to come help him out of this mess now. He found his bearings as he walked around the streets, realising that he wasn't that far from work. He might as well go there since he had no cash on him to get home. 

"Well, you look like shit." Sehyuk scoffed as Hojoon passed him in the locker room. He didn't even respond. "Jiwon wants to see you. Your little boyfriend's been here all day waiting for you to show up and he's not happy about it." 

_Boyfriend?_

"Jiho? Where is he?" 

Sehyuk shrugged. "I'd go see the first boss if I were you."

That was the last thing he wanted. He had to find Jiho to apologise. And get him out of here if Jiwon was pissed off at him. He couldn't risk Jiho's safety. 

He pulled the hood of his jacket up, hoping no one would recognise him as he looked around the bar for the redhead. 

"Hojoon." A deep voice spoke behind him.  _Fuck_. 

"What the fuck do you think you're playing at?" Jiwon grabbed his shoulder harshly, spinning the younger round to face him. "Look at the state of you." 

He pulled Hojoon off the main floor of the club, where none of the customers could see him. 

"Where the fuck have you been? You were meant to be here hours ago." The blonde backed up against the wall, he had completely forgotten he was even meant to be working tonight. 

"You look a complete mess." Jiwon pulled his hood of his jacket down, roughly grabbing Hojoon's jaw so he could look at the dark red marks on his neck. "You let someone fuck you? I hope he paid. You owe me big time. Where's the money your precious Jiho gave you last night, huh? You better not be holding out on me." 

"I need to see him. Where is he?" Hojoon tried to look past Jiwon's much larger frame for any sign of the redhead. 

The back of Jiwon's hand made contact with his cheek. 

"Don't  _fucking_  talk back to me."

Hojoon felt tears sting his eyes, but he wasn't going to let them fall this time. Jiwon liked to see him cry. 

"Are you forgetting who you belong to Hojoon? Until you pay me back every single penny, your tight little ass is mine." He pressed Hojoon up against the wall, reaching down to grope the smaller boy through his sweatpants. 

"Jiwon, stop...please." Hojoon whimpered as he tried to escape, but Jiwon was much bigger and stronger than him, pinning him to the wall. 

Jiwon bit down hard on his neck, branding the blonde as his own, pressing his hips forward against Hojoon's, further preventing him from moving. 

Hojoon bit down on his bottom lip in an attempt to stop any more whimpers surfacing, knowing Jiwon got off on it. He screwed his eyes shut, pretending none of this was happening. Jiwon's nails weren't scraping over his skin. His teeth weren't digging into his neck. His hands weren't making their way past the waistband of his sweatpants. 

"Please. Stop." His voice was barely above a whisper, knowing Jiwon wouldn't listen to him anyway. He never did.

"Hojoon?"

His eyes snapped open, vision blurred with tears.  _Jiho_. 

Jiwon backed off slightly at the intrusion, turning to scowl at whoever had interrupted him; giving Hojoon enough space to squirm out from underneath the taller man. 

He ran to Jiho, throwing his arms around the younger's slim waist, sobbing into his grey sweater. Jiho instinctively wrapped his arms around the blonde, eyes boring into the tattooed man. 

"What's going on here?"

Jiwon sneered. "None of your business." He crossed the room to thread his fingers through Hojoon's hair. Jiho felt the elder tense up in his arms. "Hojoon and I were just having a little fun."

"He told you to stop."

"That little whore doesn't get to tell me what to do. I literally own him, Jiho." Jiwon's smirk grew. "Unless you're willing to buy him off me, you seem pretty loaded."

Jiho turned, repositioning Hojoon so he blonde was behind him, his eyebrows furrowing. 

"Buy him? He's a human being. What the fuck's wrong with you!?"

"Tell him how much you owe me, Hojoon." He looked past Jiho at the blonde cowering behind him. 

"Fifteen grand." 

Jiho's mouth hung open, turning to look at Hojoon. "Fifteen  _thousand_  pounds?"

"You interested, Jiho?" 

Hojoon couldn't even bring himself to look at the redhead; he didn't want him to know all of this. He was dealing with it by himself. He was coping. He didn't need Jiho getting mixed up in this. The model should have just gone back to his perfect life with his perfect boyfriends and left Hojoon to deal with this alone. 

"Oh, I don't take cheques."

His eyes snapped up to the pair in front of him. Jiho was halfway through writing out a cheque before Jiwon stopped him. 

"What are you doing?!" Hojoon hissed at Jiho. Why was he even considering paying off his debt? Hojoon was nothing to him. Jiho couldn't possibly like him that much. He had been so awful to the redhead earlier. 

Jiho ignored him. "I can't get you fifteen grand in cash in one go."

"Then we'll set up a payment plan. But I'm adding an extra grand of interest for every day I don't get my money."

Jiho inhaled deeply. Well there goes the house deposit he was saving up for. 

"Fine. But you leave him alone. He has nothing to do with you anymore. He doesn't work here. You don't bother him. You stay the fuck away from him."

Jiwon shrugged, nonchalantly looking at his nails. "Sure, whatever, I don't really care. Just get me my money, pretty boy." Jiho flinched at the nickname. He really hated when people called him that. 

"I'll bring the first of it over tomorrow. Come on, Hojoon." He laced his fingers with the blonde's, pulling the stunned dancer behind him. 

"Jiho, what the fuck?" He stopped as they reached the street, pulling his hand free from Jiho's loose grasp. "Why would you do that?"

"It's fine, I can afford it."

Hojoon could tell he was lying. "No you fucking can't. That's  _fifteen_ grand, Jiho. Why would you give him that much?! You  _bought_  me!"

"I didn't  _buy_  you, Hojoon, you can't just buy people. I'm paying him off. You could at least be grateful."

Hojoon blanched. "Is that why you did this? Because you want me and now I owe you? I'm yours now, aren't I?" Jiho had just done this to look like some kind of saviour. Hojoon couldn't possibly say no to being with him after this. The guy had just bought him for 15k. 

Jiho sighed. 

"That's not why I did this. You don't owe me anything. What else was I meant to do? I couldn't just leave you with him, Hojoon. He was going to  _rape_  you." Jiho's voice cracked at the word. He knew it was a ridiculous amount of money, but there was no way he could leave Hojoon in that situation after what he saw. 

Hojoon raked his hands through his blonde hair, pulling at the strands. He hated that word. 

"N-no he wasn't, that's just part of my job." His voice was wavering, tears silently falling down his face as he remembered Jiwon's nails digging into his skin. 

"Hojoon." He gently placed his hand on the blonde's shoulder. "You asked him to stop and he didn't." He could feel the elder shaking, pulling him back into a protective hug. 

"I'll get you a taxi, make sure you get home safe, okay?"

Hojoon nuzzled back into Jiho's chest, leaving dark grey tear stains on the soft material of his sweater. 

"Can I stay at yours tonight? I don't want to be alone." His voice was muffled, not wanting to admit that he couldn't deal with this alone. 

"Of course you can, babe."

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Hojoon woke up with a pair of arms wrapped around his waist. This time it felt right. He could smell Jiho; feel the warmth of the younger boy next to him. 

Jiho was already awake, looking over at him with a concerned smile on his face. 

"Hey, you."

Hojoon smiled back, meekly. "Hi."

"It was him, wasn't it? He's the one that's been doing this to you."

Hojoon nodded, his gaze dropping to Jiho's chest so he didn't have to look the younger in the eye. 

Jiho brushed blonde strands away from his eyes. He hadn't pushed anything the night before again, letting Hojoon cry himself to sleep in his arms without prying. 

"You don't have to worry about him anymore."

"You shouldn't have done that, Jiho. I-I was paying him back. Now I have to pay you back and I don't have that kind of money. I don't even have a job anymore." He panicked; he couldn't even celebrate being saved from Jiwon because now Jiho had this over him. He was back to square one. In bed with a man he owed fifteen grand.

"I already told you, you don't owe me anything. I didn't do this because I wanted to own you. You're not just some possession, Hojoon. I wish you could see that."

"So...you don't want to sleep with me?"

Jiho offered him a pensive smile. He hated that Hojoon thought that was all he was good for. 

"I'd be lying if I said I didn't, you already know that. But I don't want to you feel like you have to because of this. That's not what this was about at all. I just couldn't stand back and let someone abuse you like that." He noticed the way Hojoon's eyes begin to glass over. "Don't worry about the money, seriously. You're worth way more than fifteen grand." 

Hojoon didn't understand Jiho at all. He didn't know people this selfless existed. He was a prostitute. A prostitute who had gotten himself into a lot of trouble. He brought this on himself. If he hadn't stolen all that meth from Jiwon, he never would have ended up in this situation. He couldn't understand why Jiho would ever want to help someone like him. 

"What about Taeyang and Hansol? That was their money too, right? They're going to hate me." He didn't know why he cared. He had never even met Hansol properly. 

Jiho shook his head. "They have their own money. Even if it was theirs, they'd understand why I had to do what I did. Especially Tae." Hojoon saw something flicker in Jiho's eyes when he mentioned the brunette. 

"Anyway." He sat up, throwing a t-shirt on. "I'm hungry, let's go get breakfast."


	3. Feelings? Never Heard of Her

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm bored and i hate my job so here u go finally some smut!!

Hojoon ended up staying at Jiho's over the coming week, he couldn't face going back to his shitty apartment with his shitty roommate who probably hadn't even realised he had been away for so long. 

He was bored though. He hadn't realised how much Jiho worked. He had never been unemployed before; he didn't understand how people could just sit around all day. Daytime TV was terrible. 

Despite everything, he actually really enjoyed stripping. He loved performing, the baited breath, all eyes being on him. He just had to find somewhere that didn't expect any more from him. Somewhere with security that would actually kick people out for disobeying the no touch rule. Somewhere that actually  _had_  a no touch rule. 

He filled his days with going to auditions instead of lying around watching Jeremy Kyle until one of the others came back from work or university. He was surprised to find that most strip club managers actually cared about their dancers. Treated them like humans. Even the dancers themselves seemed to be happy in their jobs. 

It was almost June, a month after he had left Jiwon's club, when he finally got a call back. He thanked several Gods he didn't believe in, unemployment really wasn't for him. He hadn't told any of the others that he was getting back into stripping, but they couldn't exactly stop him. Plus, that's all he's good at and he felt terrible for not being able to contribute since he was basically living there now. 

He felt like he got some of his old fire back. He had spent so much time moping and self-loathing he had forgotten that actually, he was a really talented dancer. 

Jiho came home that night to find Taeyang and Hansol asleep together on the sofa. He smiled to himself, laying a blanket over his boyfriends so they didn't get cold. Something felt off, though. He was so used to seeing Hojoon in between them, usually tangled in Hansol's limbs since the younger blonde had taken such a liking to him. He hoped Hojoon hadn't taken off; he had always had a nagging feeling that one day he would just leave. 

"You're back!"

Hojoon jumped off his bed and threw his arms around Jiho's waist, rising up on his toes to press a kiss to the redhead’s lips. Jiho noticed he was wearing nothing but one of his white dress shirts, it was so big on him, reaching the middle of his thigh. 

"I missed you."

Jiho smiled to himself, Hojoon was never usually this affectionate. 

"I have some good news. I found a job." The blonde beamed up at him. "At this club in the city centre. Everyone seems really nice there."

"A strip club?"

Hojoon avoided Jiho's eyes, fixating on the younger's lips as he nodded. "Yeah...it’s not like the last one though. There's a strict no touching rule. I'll be safe there." 

Jiho wasn't convinced. "Is this a good idea, after everything?"

Hojoon un-looped his arms from around Jiho's middle, untucking the younger's shirt from his jeans. 

"This is what I want. It's what I do best, Jiho. I'm a performer. If anything goes wrong I'll leave straight away. I refuse to let myself live like that again." 

He looked up at the model, hoping he would understand. He didn't know why he wanted Jiho's blessing, it was his life, and he could do what he wanted. But he wanted the younger to be on board with his decision. 

Hojoon fiddled with the buttons of Jiho's shirt as the look of concern the redhead wore turned into a knowing smile. "If that's what's gonna make you happy, Hojoon, then go for it. But promise me you'll tell me if you ever feel unsafe there."

The blonde nodded, pressing a gentle kiss to Jiho's sternum as he pushed the shirt off of his broad shoulders. "We should celebrate."

He hooked his finger in the waistband of Jiho's jeans, pulling him over to the bed and pushing him into a sitting position on the edge of the mattress.  

The model's mouth hung open as Hojoon began to slowly unbutton the shirt he had on, revealing his prominent collarbones. Hojoon sat on Jiho's lap, knees either side of the taller boy's hips. 

"I've been thinking about you all day." He purred, pressing another kiss to Jiho's lips as he continued to unbutton his own shirt, the material slipping off his shoulders. 

"I'm ready, Jiho." The material pooled around his arms, revealing the full length of his bare torso. "I want you so bad." 

He revelled in the way Jiho was looking at him; pupils dilated, a faint blush in his cheeks as he took in every inch of Hojoon's near-flawless skin. His heart warmed to see that all of the bruises had faded. 

"Are you sure?"

"Positive." Hojoon rocked his hips slightly, brushing up against the growing bulge in Jiho's jeans. "Thank you for not taking advantage of me when I was going through all that, I really appreciate it. But I'm ready Jiho, I need you to..." He hesitated, not sure if he was ready to say the words. "Show me how much I mean to you."

Hojoon knew there was something between him and Jiho. Something special, more than just the raw sexual attraction he had originally felt. But he didn't know what, and it scared him. Hojoon didn't have... _feelings_  for guys. He didn't do boyfriends or romance or  _love_. Even thinking about the word made him feel nauseous. But he knew Jiho saw something in him, he saw him as more than just a prostitute. More than just a stripper. Jiho truly cared for him, which was more than he had ever had before. 

Jiho grazed his lips against Hojoon's, fingers lightly running up the elders thighs, under the hem of his shirt. He had wanted this for so long, but not until he was sure Hojoon wanted it too. He didn't want the blonde sleeping with him because he felt obligated to do so, because of the money. He wanted Hojoon to want it just as much as he wanted the dancer. 

He kissed the smaller boy deeper, repositioning him so he was laid back on the bed. He sat back, undoing the last few buttons of Hojoon's shirt, fully exposing the blonde. It wasn't the first time Jiho had seen Hojoon naked, that's how they met after all, but he looked even more breath-taking like this than he did on stage. Legs spread, skin flushed and looking back at Jiho through half-lidded eyes. 

His fingers traced patterns on Hojoon's skin, from his faint abs to his inner thighs, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. Hojoon's back arched into the touch. 

"Jiho, please. Don't tease me. I've waited long enough for this." He breathed out, desperate for more friction. 

"You're such a Princess." Jiho smirked, crawling off the bed from his position between Hojoon's legs to undo his jeans and gather what he needed. A soft _'fuck'_ left the blonde's lips as Jiho let his jeans and underwear drop to the floor. 

"You ready, precious?" Hojoon nodded eagerly as Jiho climbed back into the bed, rolling a condom onto his hard length. He poured some of the lube onto his fingers, slowly pushing one into Hojoon's entrance. 

Hojoon giggled. 

"I kinda already prepped myself while I was waiting for you to come home." Jiho quirked an eyebrow, pulling his finger out of Hojoon's already loosened hole. The elder smirked. "Don't worry; I'll let you watch next time."

Something flashed through Jiho's eyes as he lunged forward to catch Hojoon's bottom lip between his teeth. The elder whined as Jiho spread his legs further, bracing himself for what was coming. 

"Jiho. Please." He was getting desperate. He needed Jiho in him. He needed Jiho to show him what it felt like to be with someone that truly cared for him. 

"Okay, baby." He pressed another soft kiss to Hojoon's lips as he lined up at the blonde's entrance, gently pushing into him. 

Hojoon's eyes fluttered shut, lifting his hips up to meet Jiho's as the younger inched into him. He whined into Jiho's mouth, his fingers finding their way into crimson hair. 

"Fuck. Ji- Ahh- You're so big."

Jiho pulled back, features laced with concern. "Do you want me to stop?" 

Hojoon giggled again. "You're cute. Keep going." He pulled Jiho down by the back of his neck, whispering into the shell of his ear. "I kinda like it when it hurts." 

Jiho's eyes darkened; pushing all the way into Hojoon. The blonde cried out, his hands fisting in Jiho's hair as the younger began to pick up a steady rhythm. 

Jiho was so gentle with him, treated him like he was something precious. He made sure the blonde was comfortable, that he was enjoying himself; as opposed to using him to get off like all the others did. 

And it felt good. 

_It felt so good._

Having someone as kind and caring as Jiho fucking into him made it feel a hundred times better. The chaste kisses on his neck and cheeks, the soft whispers of his name, the way Jiho looked deep into his eyes as he moved inside of him. 

Jiho even let him come first. Stroking him to completion as Hojoon cried out his name. He had a knot in his stomach long after he rode out his orgasm, kind of like butterflies but more intense. Warmth rushed through his whole body as Jiho took care of him; cleaned him up and made sure he was okay. 

"God, Jiho. That was unreal." 

Jiho smiled down at him, pressing an array of kisses down the side of his face and neck, making Hojoon giggle. 

"Why do you call me Princess?"

Jiho shrugged. "I dunno, I just thought it suits you. I think you deserve to be treated like one. Don’t you like it?"

Hojoon considered the nickname for a minute, threading his fingers through Jiho's vibrant hair. "No, I do. But you better treat me like a Princess every time you fuck me. I can be very high maintenance." The blonde grinned, eyes glowing with mischief. 

"Oh. That reminds me, I have something for you." He pulled a wooden black box out from his bedside drawer, pulling out a small, translucent stone. 

"This is a fire opal, you were born in October, right?"

Hojoon nodded, sitting up on his elbows to peer into the box which was split into separate compartments, each filled with a number of stones. 

"Then this is your birthstone. There are loads of different types of opal, but this is the best one for you." He handed Hojoon's the gemstone, allowing the elder to inspect the iridescent orange crystal. 

"It's a protective stone; I want you to keep it with you when you're at work, okay? I can get it put in a necklace for you if you want. It works well when worn at the solar plexus chakra."

"Solar plexus...chakra?"

Jiho nodded. "Lie back." He placed two fingers at the base of Hojoon's ribs. "Here. It's one of the main chakras. Think of them as centres of energy. Yours are really out of balance. Close your eyes and relax for me." 

Hojoon let his eyes fall shut, sinking back into the mattress. He was already relaxed due to exhaustion overtaking him from the intensity of the orgasm Jiho had just given him. 

The redhead set about cleansing Hojoon's chakras, placing apt crystals in the appropriate places, explaining what each stone meant as he went. 

"This is where I'm going to put your fire opal; on the sacral chakra." He took a sharp intake of breath. "This centre represents intimacy, relationships, sexuality. The fire opal is a symbol of hope...it can help you let go of the past."

Hojoon tensed up as the stone was placed just below his navel. He could feel the pads of Jiho's fingers on his skin, massaging into him to calm him down. He instantly relaxed under his touch. He didn't know why he trusted Jiho so much, but he did. 

He felt is mind clear, the pressure at the back of his head alleviating as Jiho stopped talking. He could sense the younger was still close to him. Still there with him. 

He didn't know how long he had been lying there before Jiho removed the stones, but his eyes felt heavy when he opened them. He felt...lighter. Like maybe things were going to be okay after all. 

"How do you feel?" Jiho pressed a gentle kiss to the elder's lips, rubbing soothing circles into the skin where the fire opal was just seconds earlier. 

"My head doesn't hurt anymore; it has been for like, the past month." He wrapped his arms around Jiho's neck, drawing the redhead closer to him. "But I dunno if it was because of your little crystals or how hard you just made me come." 

Jiho laughed, peppering gentle kisses across the blonde's face. 

"I love you, Hojoon."

His heart sunk. Jiho wasn't meant to fall in love with him. He couldn't possibly be in love with someone like Hojoon. 

"Jiho...I don-"

"I know you don't feel the same, I don't expect you to. I'm happy with what we have." Jiho interrupted. "But I just want you to know that someone loves you."

Hojoon's face heated up, he could feel the tears welling up behind his eyes, forcing them to stay down. Jiho was too good for him. Hojoon couldn't give him the love he wanted in return. He wanted to; Jiho was the most amazing person he had ever met. But he had no idea how. He had never experienced anything like that before, never allowed himself to experience it. 

"Thank you, Jiho."

"Anytime, Princess."

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Hojoon didn't like the way the three boys made him feel. He didn't like having feelings. They made him nauseous. 

He didn't like things he couldn't understand. And he couldn't understand how easily the three of them had adapted to him being in their lives. Why they would even want to adapt. He couldn't get his head around it. 

Here were three boys, perfectly in love with one another. They either had their dream jobs or were studying something they loved at university. They were even saving up to buy some big house in some expensive part of the city. They fit together perfectly. 

Yet, they threw that all away for Hojoon. 

Taeyang and Hansol seemed completely unphased that Jiho had spent the majority of their savings on some prostitute. That they hadn't slept in the same bed as their taller boyfriend for months because of said prostitute. That he had fallen in love with said prostitute. 

He just didn't get it. 

He was in no way an expert on love or relationships, but he was sure they weren't meant to be like this. It all seemed so one sided to him. Like everything Taeyang and Hansol did was for Jiho. 

Maybe Jiho wasn't who he thought he was. Maybe he was controlling and manipulative under his sugary surface. Maybe that's why Taeyang and Hansol lived like this. 

He liked Taeyang and Hansol a lot; they made him feel welcome and comforted him when Jiho wasn't around. But something about them both made him feel unsettled. They were so... _nice_. 

Jiho and Hansol made him feel special. They showered him with affection, which could be draining, but deep down he loved it. He loved the way Hansol would curl into him and play with his hair as they watched TV. He loved all the sickly sweet pet names Jiho called him. 

But then there was Taeyang. Taeyang was different. He didn't invade Hojoon's personal space, in fact, they barely spoke. Hojoon didn't know if that was because the elder was just quiet compared to his boyfriend's or if it was because he resented him. He hoped it was the former, Taeyang was way more subdued than Jiho and Hansol, but he couldn't shake the feeling that Taeyang hated him for all of this. He couldn't really blame him if he did. 

But still, Hojoon was most drawn to him. He liked being around Taeyang, the brunette made him feel calm. Jiho said it was because of his blue aura, but Hojoon had no idea what that meant. 

He wanted Taeyang to like him. 

Taeyang took a drag from his cigarette, watching the smoke dissipate over the bright lights of the Camden Lock. 

"Hey, can I have one of those?"

He turned to see Hojoon shrouded in a number of shirts and hoodies, most of them Jiho's. Despite being July the air was brisk, English summers aren't exactly the most reliable. He was so caught up in his own thoughts he hadn't even heard the balcony door open. 

"Sure." He placed a fresh cigarette to his lips, lighting it before passing it to the younger. They stood in silence as they smoked. This was the only thing that relaxed Taeyang. The only thing he really liked about this apartment. He loved that it was his and Jiho's first apartment together, but if he was being perfectly honest he couldn't stand the place. The only upside was the small balcony which faced away from the dingy bars that lined the streets of Camden. He could still hear the drunken singing and fighting from the pubs below, but at least he couldn't see them. It was the only place he could escape to. 

"Can I ask you something?" Hojoon was staring at him, his eyes shining from inside the hood pulled over his blonde hair. Taeyang hummed, urging the other to carry on. 

"Why do you put up with all of Jiho's shit?"

Taeyang laughed, stubbing out his cigarette before lighting up another one almost instantly. Chain smoking was definitely the brunette's worst habit. Still better than ones he had in the past, though. 

"I know he can be annoying but I don't mind-"

"That's not what I meant." Hojoon cut him off. His eyes locked on Taeyang as the elder turned to face him, an eyebrow quirked. "I mean, why do you let him sleep with other people? Look at you, you're gorgeous. You're kind and caring and everything he could ever want. So why would you let him fuck someone like me? I'm just some cheap whore. I don't get it, Taeyang." 

Taeyang blinked, exhaling some of the smoke from his lungs. "You're not cheap Hojoon; you're worth more than you think." 

"See." Hojoon was starting to get frustrated. "You're so fucking perfect, I don't get it." 

Taeyang scoffed. "Please, Hojoon, I'm not perfect. I can't give Jiho the love he needs, that's why I suggested he started dating Hansol, it just so happened I fell for him too. And you; Jiho was infatuated with you from the moment he saw you. Why would I want to take that away from him? I want him to be happy."

Hojoon couldn't get his head around Taeyang. How can anyone be this selfless?

"But are you happy?"

Taeyang took another long drag, menthol hitting the back of his throat as his eyes followed the lights of a plane in the north London sky. 

"I am." He turned back to Hojoon. "I have Jiho and Hansol; I love them very much, and they love me." He flicked the ash off the end of his cigarette. "And there's you, I know you and Jiho aren't together or anything, but I like having you around. You liven the place up." Taeyang smiled at the blonde, dimple digging deep into his right cheek. 

Hojoon felt his chest tighten. He wasn't sure if it was down to the poisonous fumes he was breathing in or Taeyang's words. He hoped it was the former, the last thing he needed was to be developing... _feelings_. He was here for Jiho's dick and that was about it. 

"Why don't you hate me?"

"Why would I?"

Hojoon groaned. He loved Taeyang's calming 'aura', but sometimes it pissed him off. He didn't understand how anyone could be this laid back and...lovely. 

"Because, Taeyang. You three were so happy before me. You were gonna put a deposit down on this amazing house and have an amazing life. Then I came along and ruined everything." He inhaled sharply, voice wavering. "Jiho wasted fifteen grand on me, Taeyang. Fifteen thousand pounds! I know you hate it here and I took your dream home away from you. And now you can't even sleep in the same bed as him because I'm too fucking insecure to sleep on my own."

Taeyang didn't say anything for a good thirty seconds. Hojoon bit back the tears as he took a drag of his cigarette. He had been feeling awful about this for so long. 

"It wasn't a waste of money." Taeyang finally spoke, turning to face the blonde. "If he hadn't used it to help you I would have seriously reconsidered our relationship, that wouldn't have been the Jiho I fell for. We don't need a house to be happy, Hojoon. We would much rather have you safe. Hansol feels the same way."

Hojoon shuffled uncomfortably. He didn't know how to respond to that at all. 

"Listen, I was in a lot of trouble when Jiho found me too. He was crazy about me and I thought he deserved more, but he wouldn't rest until I was his." Taeyang smiled to himself, remembering how persistent Jiho was. "He made my life so much better, Hojoon. He helped me. I would never have forgiven him if he had given up on you."

Taeyang wrapped his arms around Hojoon's shoulders, the blonde tensing up before melting into it. Taeyang had never hugged him before. 

"Don't feel like you're taking him away from us. You need him more than we do right now." Hojoon hesitantly snaked his arms around Taeyang's waist. He hadn't realised how skinny the elder was. "But if you ever need anyone less...intense to talk to, or just some peace and quiet, you know where I am. I know Jiho can be a lot to handle."

Hojoon nuzzled his nose into Taeyang's neck. He liked being in the elders arms. He felt safe, but it was a different kind of safe to when he was with Jiho. 

"I have to get ready for work." The blonde stepped back taking one last drag of his cigarette before throwing the butt over the edge of the balcony.

"Text me so I know you got there safe, sweetie." 

Hojoon thanked God that Jiho's clothes were far too big for him, his hood falling over his face so Taeyang couldn't see the small smile that creeped onto his lips as he turned to go back inside the small apartment. 

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Hojoon was curled up in one of Jiho's hoodies, nodding off to the sound of the TV playing as he recuperated from a night at work. 

He really liked the new club he was working at; it seemed to be going well. He hadn't had any run-ins with customers, and his boss actually treated him like a human being. He loved being able to perform without having to live in fear. 

He felt the sofa dip beside him. 

"Iced tea?"

Hansol was smiling down at him, two glasses in his hand Hojoon sat up, taking the drink with a small  _'thank you'_.

He liked Hansol. He didn't pry, didn't ask too many invasive questions; and when he did he usually answered them himself. They mainly had one-sided conversations, but Hojoon preferred it that way. 

"Are you and Jiho boyfriends now?"

Okay maybe he did pry a little. 

"No."

Hojoon was adamant that he and Jiho weren't together. He had started sleeping with the younger, and not because he felt like he had to. He wanted to. But he didn't want anything more than that. He loved the way Jiho treated him, like he was a real person. The way the younger cared for him. But he couldn't be with him. Jiho was into all that sentimental shit. Rings, commitment, anniversaries. That just wasn't Hojoon. He had never been in a relationship, never really wanted one. He and Jiho were too different to work out. Plus, despite what Taeyang said, he still felt so guilty for everything. Jiho's life was so much easier before him. 

Hansol hummed. 

"I think I like this boy." He smiled, taking a sip from his drink. "His name is Byungjoo, we've been friends for a while but...I think there's more there."

Hojoon blinked. He didn't even have to respond to Hansol, the younger knew he was listening. 

"I don't really know how to tell Jiho and Tae though. What if they're not okay with it?"

"Then they'd be hypocrites." Hojoon wasn't great at mincing his words. "They can't get mad about you dating anyone else or whatever when you're in this poly relationship. Especially Jiho, he's sleeping with me."

"Yeah...you're right." Hansol settled into the back of the worn sofa, his eyes scanning over Hojoon's profile. "Can I ask you something?"

Hojoon nodded. "Sure, you're going to anyway. I might not answer though."

"Why are you so afraid of being loved?"

Hojoon tensed up. He wasn't afraid of being loved. He just didn't believe in love. Not for him, anyway. He didn't believe anyone could ever love him, which is why he didn't let anyone get too close. Having a boyfriend would just get his hopes up that maybe they would fall in love with him. But he knew that would never happen, which is why he didn't even chance dating anyone. He was too damaged to be loved.

"I'm not. I just know it'll never happen for me so I don't bother looking for it."

"Why not? You're gorgeous. I'm sure loads of guys have fallen for you."

He scoffed. "They've never loved me. They loved having me. It's different." He kept his eyes trained on the TV ahead of him, not actually taking in what was going on. "No one has ever loved me, why would that change after twenty-one years?"

"Because you have us now." Hansol's voice was bright. Hojoon turned to face the other blonde. "Jiho loves you. And I love you, Hojoon. I mean, not like that, but as a friend. It's still love though."

Hojoon gaped. He didn't know how to respond to that. He had never really had friends. Acquaintances, colleagues; but not friends. Hansol laced their fingers together, turning to watch the TV as he rested his head on Hojoon's shoulder. 

 


	4. Falling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's my birthday and i'm sad bc i'm gettin so old so this is a bday present from me to me i guess lol

Hojoon settled into life with the three boys pretty easily. He barely went back to his own apartment. He didn't stop paying for it though, admitting he lived with them was way too much commitment. 

"Guess what!"

Jiho burst into the small apartment with a huge grin on his face. The three of them were already sat around the kitchen table having received a text from Jiho earlier telling them he had news. 

The redhead sat with them, three sets of eyes full of anticipation staring back at him. 

"I've been cast for Fashion Week."

Hansol screamed, causing Hojoon to flinch slightly. He watched as the smaller blonde jumped into his boyfriend's lap, planting a big wet kiss on his lips. 

"In New York." Jiho managed to breathe out as he and Hansol parted. 

"Are you serious?" Taeyang shot out of his chair next, throwing his arms around Jiho's neck. "I'm so proud of you, Bambi!" Taeyang pressed a kiss to Jiho's lips too; it was softer but deeper than Hansol's. 

He watched the three of them. They were so in love. He didn't understand how he fit into all of this. 

"I have to leave on Sunday, for like two weeks."

Hansol pouted. "I always miss you when you're gone." 

Jiho smiled softy, rubbing his nose against Hansol's. "I miss you too, Kitten, but with the money I get from this we can definitely afford to move out of here." 

Taeyang clapped his hands together. "Okay, we're going out to celebrate, and I'm paying so don't even bother bringing money, Shin Jiho."

Jiho huffed in mock protest as Taeyang dragged Hansol off to get ready. His eyes fell on Hojoon who was sitting across from him. 

"Are you okay with this?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

Hojoon hadn't been apart from Jiho for more than two days for almost five months now. He would never admit that he was nervous about him being away for two whole weeks. Who was he to stop Jiho from following his dreams? He knew how much the younger wanted this. 

"You just don't seem too...pleased."

Hojoon sighed, making his way over to Jiho and settling down in the redhead's lap, in a much calmer fashion than Hansol had. "I'm really happy for you, Jiho. I know how hard you've worked for this." He left a gentle kiss on the younger's cheek. "I just felt kinda awkward watching you three together. I don't really know how I fit into this...thing you all have. I didn't want to encroach on your moment."

"I don't want you feeling weird around us." He loosely looped his arms around Hojoon's hips. "We love having you here, but whatever you want from us is up to you. If you don't want anything more than what we already have, I'm okay with that. Whatever makes you comfortable."

Hojoon wasn't sure what he wanted anymore. He knew there was more between him and Jiho, but he didn't know what, and he was scared to find out. Hansol was like a best friend to him, and he was more than okay with that. But he had no idea where he stood with Taeyang. The whole situation confused him. 

"Will you be okay while I'm gone?"

Hojoon nodded. He wasn't sure he would be, but he couldn't stop Jiho from going. 

"I'll make sure Tae and Hansol look after you." 

Hojoon scoffed, looking up at Jiho. "I'm a big boy, I can look after myself."

A smile broke out on Jiho's lips. "I know that, Princess, but I like looking after you. If you ever need them, they'll be there for you."

Hojoon already knew that. Taeyang and Hansol had made it clear that he meant something to them. 

He kissed Jiho again, deeper this time, giving the younger an entrance as soon as he asked for it. Hojoon melted as their tongues moved fluidly against one another. 

They broke apart after Jiho jerked forward, a small whimper leaving his throat. He was rubbing the back of his head, pouting up at his small brunette boyfriend. 

"Can you two stop necking on and get ready? We have dinner reservations in an hour."

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

The first few days without Jiho were hell. Hojoon had never felt so lost, he hadn't realised how much he depended on the redhead. 

Nights were the worst. It felt wrong sleeping in Jiho's bed without him there. He looked over at the set of stones on the bedside table. Jiho had left them, explaining they would help remind Hojoon that he would always be there for him, even if it wasn't physically. It wasn't the same, though. 

It was 3am; he couldn't sleep at all, figuring he may as well go watch TV or something to pass the time. 

Taeyang was out on the balcony, Hojoon went to join him, grabbing his cigarettes from the kitchen table. 

"Can't sleep?"

The blonde nodded, lighting up. 

"Me either. I always get like this when he's away. Did he leave you amethyst and selenite?"

Hojoon shrugged. "He left me a bunch of crystals but I kinda wasn't paying attention."

"Come here." Taeyang opened his arms, signalling for Hojoon to cuddle into him, which the younger did. "You can sleep with me or Hansol if you want; I know you haven't been on your own for a while." 

Hojoon hummed, not sure if that's what he wanted or not. 

"Are you doing anything next Friday?"

Hojoon exhaled smoke from his lungs; he had been joining Taeyang out on the balcony more often lately. They mainly just sat in silence, but there was something that drew him to the elder. 

"Not 'til midnight, why?"

"We're going to look at houses, if you want to come. We have enough money for a deposit, and now I've graduated and got a proper job we can afford the mortgage. I've finally persuaded Jiho to get rid of this shithole, even though he's super attached to it. I can't bear living in Camden much longer." Taeyang almost shuddered as the name of the borough left his lips. 

Hojoon blinked. "Why would you want me there?"

Taeyang shrugged, eyes fixed on the flashing lights of a police car a few streets away. He really hated this part of the city. 

"You spend so much time here anyway I don't see why you're still paying rent for your apartment. You should just move in with us."

Hojoon pulled his hoodie closer around himself, he was cold but something inside him felt warm, and it wasn't from the cigarettes. He knew he was just throwing money away paying for his shitty flat in East London. It wasn't that expensive, he usually made enough to cover his rent in a couple of nights, although, he would much rather spend that on himself. But he was nowhere near ready to move in with anyone. He hated his flat, couldn't really stand his roommate, but it was a sanctuary he could escape to when he felt too suffocated by Jiho's affection. 

"You'd have your own room obviously, we all would. I want, like, a huge six bedroom place. I can't wait." He took a drag of his cigarette, turning to Hojoon. "I love Hansol and Jiho to bits, but if I don't get my own space soon I'm gonna smother them both in their sleep." 

Hojoon laughed, this is why he loved Taeyang. They weren't that different, Taeyang needed his alone time just like Hojoon did. It gave him hope that maybe someone could love him as much as Jiho and Hansol love Taeyang.  _Maybe_. If he didn't keep pushing everyone away. 

Wait.  _Loved_  Taeyang? Since when did he  _love_  Taeyang? He must have gotten his adjectives mixed up, that was it, just a simple mistake. How could he be in love with Taeyang? He was the boyfriend of the guy he was fucking - surely that's not how this is meant to work. 

"Plus, they always have food at open houses; I don't think it's a myth that they bake cookies to make them smell good. I hope it's not anyway." Taeyang's voice pulled him from his thoughts, he was glad it was dark so the elder couldn't see the faint blush that was creeping over Hojoon's cheeks. Taeyang really wanted him to come to this thing, huh?

"Okay fine, but only for the free cookies." Hojoon teased, stubbing out his cigarette in the ash tray between them. "And if they don't have any, you're buying me some on the way home."

_Fuck, did I just refer to this shitty little apartment as home?_

"You're such a brat." Taeyang smiled, following suit as he disposed of his own cigarette. He shivered, catching Hojoon in a back hug as he pushed the younger through the door that led to the tiny balcony. "Now get inside, I'm fucking freezing."

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Hojoon woke up with a pair of arms wrapped around his waist. He knew it wasn't Jiho, but he didn't freak out. The person nestled into his back was much more petite, but he could still feel warmth radiating from him. 

He had spent his nights alternating between Taeyang and Hansol's beds, sometimes sleeping in between the two of them. He definitely preferred waking up with Taeyang. 

He turned gently in the elder's arms, trying not to wake him up. He could see why Jiho called him Angel; he looked ethereal, even when he was sleeping. 

He brushed his fingers over Taeyang's sharp cheekbones, a soft smile gracing his lips at the contact. Taeyang's eyes fluttered open, smiling as he saw Hojoon's staring back at him. 

"Morning, Muffin. Did you sleep okay?"

Hojoon nodded, hoping Taeyang would be too tired to notice the rose pink that was dusting his cheeks. 

"Taeyang?"

The brunette hummed, urging Hojoon to continue as his eyes fell shut. 

"How do you know when you're in love?"

The brunette shifted so he was lying on his back, stretching out his stiff limbs. 

"I imagine it's different for everyone."

He rolled his eyes, that answer was no use to him. 

"How did you know you were in love with Jiho? Or Hansol for that matter."

Taeyang thought for a moment, running his fingers through Hojoon's platinum hair as he stared at the ceiling. 

"I couldn't stop thinking about them." He was smiling to himself, Hojoon could tell that even now, after all this time, he couldn't stop thinking about them. "It was different with Jiho. I didn't want to fall for him, he was only fifteen when we met, and I was nearly eighteen so it felt...wrong. There's only, like, two and a half years between us, but it still didn't seem right that I had these feelings for him, so I tried to push him away as much as possible. It didn't work though; you know yourself how persistent he can be when he wants something." Taeyang giggled, turning his head to look at Hojoon. 

"Eventually, it got to the point where I couldn't bear being without him. I did a lot of stupid stuff to get him off my mind but...I couldn't. He was all I thought about. I'm not an overly affectionate person, but I started to crave him holding my hand or cuddling me. I still get like that to be honest. Whenever he's away for too long all I want is to curl up in his lap like I used to when we were kids."

Hojoon's face heated up, nausea creeping up on him. He knew that feeling all too well. He wasn't meant to fall in love. 

"Why? Are you falling for Jiho?"

Hojoon shook his head. "I don't think so." His voice was small. "I think I'm falling for someone else. And...I feel bad because I feel like I should be in love with Jiho instead." 

Taeyang quirked an eyebrow, repositioning himself so he was on his side, face only centimetres away from Hojoon's. 

"You can't help who you fall for, Jiho knows that better than anyone. He didn't do any of this to force you to love him back."

"I know that." He swallowed thickly. "But it still feels weird, I don't think I like being in love."

Taeyang grinned, dimple on full show. "I get that. Are you scared he won't like you back?"

Hojoon shifted uncomfortably. What sort of question was that? Of course he was. He was terrified of rejection. 

"Hojoon." Taeyang started, fingers under the blonde's jawline, forcing their eyes to meet. "Anyone would be lucky to have you." 

A faint blush crept up Hojoon's neck as he lunged forward, his lips crashing down on Taeyang's. 

The elder froze, eyes wide. He hadn't been expecting that. His lips quirked into a smile as he leaned into the kiss, his fingers ghosting over Hojoon's waist. 

Hojoon inwardly breathed a sigh of relief that Taeyang was kissing him back, their living situation would have gotten really awkward really fast if the brunette had rejected him. He tilted his head slightly to gain more access to Taeyang's plush lips, poking his tongue out to ask for an entrance. Taeyang's lips fell apart as Hojoon's fingers tangled themselves in his hair, whimpering slightly as the younger boy climbed on top of him. 

Hojoon pulled back first, panting softly as he looked down on Taeyang. He looked so cute with pink gracing his high cheekbones. 

"I take it you were talking about me then?" The brunette smirked. "Aw, Hojoonie, can you not stop thinking about me?" He teased, poking the blonde in the ribs, causing the younger to roll off of him, whining. 

Hojoon floundered, flushing even further, his face turning an awkward shade of beetroot as he whined the elder’s name. "No, of course not, don't be so ridiculous." He huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

The brunette slid over to him, hovering over the younger. "You don't?" He pouted. "That's a shame, because I really like you." 

His fingers danced over the exposed skin of Hojoon's waist, from where his t-shirt had rolled up. Was Taeyang for real? Or was he just teasing him? 

"Tae..." 

"Yeah, babe?"

"It's you."

A faux bewildered expression graced the brunette's face, eyes wide. "What's me?"

Hojoon groaned, rolling his eyes. 

"Say it, Hojoonie." Taeyang's breath was hot against the shell of his ear as he whispered, fingers moving south on his skin. 

"It's you that I'm..." Hojoon took a deep breath. "...falling for."

Taeyang's lips were on Hojoon's. He gasped as Taeyang palmed the growing erection through his sweatpants, the elders tongue delving into his mouth as his lips parted. Taeyang really didn't mess around. 

He had just begun to get into the kiss, hips arching to meet Taeyang's touch when the elder broke away. 

He peppered gentle kisses across Hojoon's cheek, down to his neck. The younger whimpered, tilting his head to give Taeyang more access as he latched onto his ear lobe, squeezing slightly harder on Hojoon's bulge. 

"I want your dick in me."

Hojoon's eyes shot open at the hushed command, moaning lightly as Taeyang touched him. The elder had such a calm, angelic nature he hadn't expected him to be so direct. He always imagined Taeyang to be more reserved and hesitant during sex. Clearly not. 

Taeyang sat up, shedding his clothes before he rolled onto his back, giving Hojoon full control. 

Hojoon laughed at how quickly Taeyang moved; the brunette was usually so laid back. "Someone's impatient."

"I've had to listen to you fuck my boyfriend for the past four months." He pulled Hojoon on top of him; hands roaming under the younger's loose t-shirt. "I've been patient enough."

Hojoon kissed Taeyang deeply, the elder handing him a bottle of lube as their tongues moved against one another. The blonde slipped a single slicked up digit into Taeyang, the elder gasping at the intrusion. 

He could feel Taeyang getting feverish, squirming underneath Hojoon as he stretched him open. 

"You really want my dick, huh?"

Taeyang whimpered, bucking his hips up to meet Hojoon's as the blonde slipped a third finger inside him. 

"Ah- Yes." He hissed. "Can you just hurry up and put it in me? I can take it."

Hojoon latched onto Taeyang's mouth again, swallowing a moan as he withdrew his fingers. He sat back on his knees, peeling his t-shirt off. 

"How do you want this?"

Taeyang hummed, genuinely considering the question. "Against this wall." He reached behind himself, patting the wall his bed backed into. 

An amused smile danced across Hojoon's lips as he stood to remove his boxers. 

Taeyang pouted. "What?"

Hojoon shook his head, crawling back onto the bed as Taeyang repositioned himself so he was sitting back against the wall. "Nothing. I didn't know you were so kinky, that's all. I expected you to be really vanilla."

Taeyang smirked, shuffling onto Hojoon's lap as the younger knelt between Taeyang's legs. "There's a lot you don't know about me, Jeon Hojoon." He whispered, brushing blonde hair out of Hojoon's reddened ears. "Now, fuck me. Hard."

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

This time Hojoon woke with his arms around someone else's waist. Even though they were the same height and build, Taeyang felt so tiny next to him. He loved the idea of waking up with the elder wrapped up in his arms every morning. 

"Mmm, Hojoonie." Taeyang cuddled closer into Hojoon's chest. "That was so much better than I had ever imagined."

_Imagined?_

"Do you touch yourself thinking about me fucking you, Tae?" Hojoon smirked at the brunette. 

Taeyang pulled back, giving him a  _'no shit'_  look. 

"Hojoon, sweetie, I'd be pretty weird if I didn't touch myself to the soundtrack of  _'Fuck! Jiho! Harder! Ah! Harder!'_ " he moaned in a high pitched voice, imitating the blonde. 

"I don't sound like that!" He whined, shoving Taeyang's chest lightly, the elder laughing. 

"You really do. It's pretty hot actually." 

Hojoon whined again, louder this time as he buried his face in Taeyang's neck. "You're pretty loud yourself, you know."

Taeyang shrugged. "I like letting my lover know how well they're doing...or how bad, if needs be. I don't have that problem with you or Jiho though."

Hojoon raised an eyebrow as he sat up to look at Taeyang. "What about Hansol?"

"Oh, me and Hansol don't really sleep together."

"But..." Hojoon tilted his head, "he's your boyfriend, right?"

"Yeah. Not all relationships involve sex though."

Hojoon laid his head on the pillow next to Taeyang. He didn't understand all these different types of relationships. He had always thought a relationship was between two people who loved each other and had sex. He had never even considered they could involve more people, or not involve sex. He has always assumed that was a huge part of relationships. Guys always used to come to him because their sex life was lacking, said it was to save their marriages. 

"I don't understand. Why not?"

"Well, there are plenty of other ways you can show someone you love them, we do all that; we're just not really sexually compatible. I don't see him that way. I love him, so much, but it's a different love to what I feel for Jiho."

Hojoon groaned. "Relationships are confusing."

Taeyang wrapped his arms around the younger, pulling him into a tight hug. 

"You'll get used to it, Muffin."

Hojoon nuzzled into Taeyang, inhaling the brunette's scent, a weird but comforting mixture of vanilla and menthol. "Jiho won't hate me, will he? For falling for you instead of him."

"Of course he won't, I don't think Jiho even knows how to hate people. He actually said we'd be cute together." 

Hojoon blushed. "So..." He hesitated. "Are you my boyfriend now?" 

"Do you want me to be? We don't have to have labels if you don-" 

"No." He cut Taeyang off. "I...I think I want you to be. I dunno if I'll be any good at it though, I've never had a boyfriend before."

"Nothing has to change" Taeyang pressed a kiss to Hojoon's temple. "Except now we get to have mind-blowing sex all the time."

Hojoon liked the sound of that. He hooked his leg over Taeyang's waist, brushing his thigh up against the elders cock, purring into his ear. 

"Okay, but, I want  _your_  dick in  _me_  this time."

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Jiho was wrecked. His flight home had been delayed, adding an extra five hours to his journey. His head was banging from the screaming kid he had been sat next to. He just wanted to curl up with his boyfriends and Hojoon and sleep for an entire day. 

He hadn't told any of them what time he was getting home, wanting it to be a surprise. He unlocked the front door, hoping his plan hadn't backfired and at least one person would be in. He heard voices and what sounded like coming from the living room. Thank god. He needed a hug ASAP. It sounded more like moaning than an actual conversation though...maybe it was just muffled by the walls.

"I'm home!"

He left his suitcase in the hallway, finding Taeyang and Hojoon on the sofa, each wearing one of his over-sized tees and not much more. 

"Jiho!" Taeyang jumped over the back of the sofa to greet his boyfriend, throwing his arms around the younger's neck, stretching up on his toes to kiss the redhead deeply. 

"Hey, Angel." Jiho beamed down at his boyfriend, head tilting as he licked his lips. "You taste like...come."

He saw Hojoon shift awkwardly on the sofa, pulling the t-shirt down to hide more of his bare thighs. 

Taeyang bit his lip, wrapping his arms around Jiho's waist, which was much more comfortable for his height. "Things...may have developed while you were away." He turned to face Hojoon. He knew the flushing blonde was nervous about seeing Jiho, now he was sleeping with his boyfriend. 

"You two are together?" His eyes were wide but Hojoon couldn't read the tone of his voice. Was he hurt? Betrayed? They did kinda go behind his back... Was this considered cheating? 

"That's so adorable!"

He dragged Taeyang over to the sofa so he could engulf both of the smaller boys in a bear hug. "My two tiny babies! Look how cute you are together! See, Tae, I told you he liked you! Oh my god, you slut, as if you have a third boyfriend before I do! Were you sucking him off just before I got back?" Jiho gushed as Taeyang pressed a soft kiss to Hojoon's cheek. 

Hojoon relaxed a little. Jiho was really okay with this. Jiho was okay with Hojoon being with his boyfriend, even though he was clearly interested in the dancer himself. Hojoon still couldn't fully wrap his head around this situation, but he was glad he had stumbled upon someone as open minded and compassionate as Jiho. He felt like one day he could fall for the redhead too. 

"I missed you both so much." Jiho whined, forcing his way in between Taeyang and Hojoon, wrapping an arm around each of them. "And Hansollie, where is he?"

"He's on his way back from work, he'll be home soon." Taeyang swung his legs over Jiho's, snuggling into his boyfriend's side. "I missed you too."

Hojoon linked his fingers with Jiho's as he watched the two boys beside him. He hadn't realised just how much he missed Jiho until he came home. He felt so safe nestled into the model's sweater, especially with Taeyang on the other side of the taller boy. 

"I missed you too, Jiho."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> incase you haven't noticed hojoon is my fave chara in this whole verse i love him sososo much i just want him to be happy my precious lil muffin princess and tae/hojoon is actually my fave relationship out of all of them!!! aaaah they're they cutest ever i luv ❤︎  
> next chapter is the final one!!!! oooo


	5. IV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here it is the last part of opal!!! i'm kinda sad its over bc hojoon is just my absolute fave in this series but i guess i couldn't make him cry forever
> 
> the next part is garnet which is byungjoo's story~

Hojoon found that being in a relationship wasn't as daunting as he first thought. Commitment had always been a huge fear of his, he had always steered well away from the 'boyfriend' title because he knew he couldn't just be with one person, he would get bored and cheat on them. He wasn't ashamed to admit he liked sleeping around. He tended to feel suffocated when he was around the same person for too long, he was scared they expected more from him than he was capable of giving. Luckily for him he didn't have that problem with Taeyang. 

He and Taeyang were very similar, they both liked their alone time and didn't have to be around each other 24/7 to know their relationship was valid.  

The main problem was that Taeyang has his own space in the apartment and Hojoon didn't. The blonde spent most of his nights with Taeyang and/or Jiho, occasionally going back to his own apartment when he felt too claustrophobic with the other boys. He hated it there. He hated having to deal with his roommate's inquisition about where he had been and why he hadn't kept in contact every time he walked in the flat. But it was the only place he felt like he could breathe properly. 

He checked over his makeup in the mirror, his eyeliner had smeared a little thanks the heat of the lights. He wasn't due to be back on stage for half an hour, getting himself a drink as he checked through the notifications on his phone. He laughed to himself at the string of texts from Taeyang; the brunette was spying on Hansol and Byungjoo's 'dinner date'. However, apparently Byungjoo was completely oblivious to the fact it was a date. 

"Hojoon, you've been requested for a private dance." 

The blonde stretched, groaning, he couldn't really be bothered with any extra work, but he needed all the cash he could get. He had pretty much been living with Taeyang, Jiho and Hansol for the past few months and he felt guilty that he was eating their food and using their electricity. After much persuading he managed to convince Jiho to let him pay rent, however that meant he was paying for two places. 

He got dressed, looking himself over in the mirror, making sure he looked completely fuckable, admiring his new hair colour. He had changed from his signature bleach blonde to a darker golden blonde. He felt like he had grown a lot over the past few months, realising that he was worth more than a few crumpled notes. Realising that people did actually care about him. 

He loved the new club he had been working at. He never had any trouble with customers overstepping the mark, the pay was better and he wasn't expected to do anything other than dance. 

"Hey, baby." He pulled out his usual routine; back to the client as he closed the door, weight shifting into one leg, making his hip pop and the oversized dress shirt he was wearing ride up, revealing the very top of his bare thighs. He smirked to himself; he knew how good he looked from behind. 

"Hey, Hojoon."

He froze. He knew that voice. 

"Ji-Jiwon?"

He turned sharply, fears confirmed as the tattooed man leered back at him. 

"You look good, Hojoonie." Jiwon stood, crossing the room in a few long strides, causing the blonde to back up against the door. "God, I've missed that ass." 

Hojoon whimpered as Jiwon reached down to grope him. A wave of nausea hit him as the elders hands roamed over his skin. They were so rough compared to Taeyang and Jiho's. A small sob got stuck in his throat. He wasn't going to cry. He couldn't let Jiwon see him cry again. 

"Why- What are you doing here?"

Jiwon backed away from the blonde, walking around the room as if he was inspecting a show home he was interested in purchasing. 

"Don't worry, Hojoonie, I'm not gonna hurt you. I just wanted to see how you're doing. Believe it or not, I actually miss having you around." He turned back to the younger with a sickly sweet smile on his face. "You always were the best fuck." 

Hojoon tried to steady his breathing, his fingers subconsciously making their way to the fire opal around his neck; the on Jiho had given him when he started working here. He knew he had to get out of here, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to move. Even though he knew he was in a safe environment, that he could just leave, it was as if he was conditioned to obey the elder. 

"How's Jiho?"

Hojoon's heart raced at the mention of the redhead. 

"I saw his latest editorial, he looks good."

"You don't get to talk about him."

Jiwon laughed. "Aw, Hojoonie, are you getting all protective of your little boyfriend? Do you actually think he cares about you? He fucking bought you off me."

Hojoon bit his lip; he knew what Jiwon was trying to do. The tattooed man had spent years making Hojoon doubt himself, making him feel like he was just some worthless whore. He wasn't about to let him destroy the months of recovery from Taeyang and Jiho's love. The two of them had healed him, made him feel cared about. 

"Is his dick better than mine?"

Something inside Hojoon snapped. He wasn't going to let Jiwon control him anymore. 

"I told you not to fucking talk about him."

He crossed the room to hit a panic button on the wall, something Jiwon wouldn't even have thought about having in his club. 

"You stay the fuck away from me, and you stay the  _fuck_  away from Jiho."

The amused smirk didn't leave Jiwon's face until security entered the room. Hojoon's old place didn't even have security; Jiwon really couldn't care less what happened to his dancers. 

"I'll see you round Hojoonie, hopefully next time we can have more fun together." Jiwon glowered, struggling as the security guards forced him out of the building. 

Hojoon collapsed against the back wall as he breathed a sigh of relief. He needed a drink, or something stronger. He made his way back to the dressing room, putting his normal clothes back on, there was no way he was going back on stage tonight. 

He needed something to take the edge off. He hadn't seen Jiwon for almost seven months, he had almost forgotten about what the elder had done to him with the help of Jiho, Taeyang and Hansol. He knew exactly which of dancers he worked with would have something to calm him down. 

He could feel the tears begin go prick his eyes as he crushed the pills into a fine powder, using his bank card to split it into three lines. He could taste the powder at the back of his throat as he snorted the lines through a rolled up £20 note, letting his eyes fall shut as the drugs seeped into his system.

"Hojoon, Sangdo wants to see you."

The blonde swore under his breath, brushing the remnants of the powder off the dressing table. He had never been called to the manager’s office while working here, but he knew from past experiences it never ended well. 

He tentatively knocked on the door, taking a deep breath as Sangdo invited him in. 

"Sangdo, I'm so sorry that you lost money because of me, I just couldn't be around that guy he-"

"Sit down, Hojoon." Sangdo was smiling at him. Not a sly smirk, a genuine smile. "Have a drink, you look stressed."

Hojoon did as he was told; he always did in these situations, nervously pulling at a thread on the sleeve of his shirt. 

"You don't have to apologise for pressing the panic button, that's what it's there for. I don't want you feeling uncomfortable in any situation, Hojoon. I know you didn't have the best time at the last club you worked at, but it's not the same here. It's my job to look out for you."

Hojoon sniffled, wiping away the tears that had begun to roll down his face. "That was him, my old boss. I just freaked out seeing him here. Having him touch me."

"He touched you?" Sangdo placed his glass down with a force, making Hojoon jump. "I'll make sure security know his face, there's no way he'll be getting back in this building, don't worry about it."

Hojoon nodded, downing the drink Sangdo had poured for him in one. He had to get Jiwon off his mind. He had come so far since Jiho had saved him, he couldn't go back to his old ways. 

"Can I have another one?"

Sangdo smiled, mixing Hojoon another drink as the blonde began to tell him about Jiwon. Sangdo could feel a heat rising in his chest as the dancer spoke. He couldn't understand how someone could treat Hojoon, or anyone else, like that. 

"I haven't seen him since Jiho paid my debt off." Hojoon slurred, finishing off his fifth drink. He powder that was already in his system made the alcohol hit him so much harder. 

"Who's Jiho, your boyfriend?"

Hojoon froze. Was Jiho his boyfriend? They acted like boyfriends, and he was pretty sure Jiho was in love with him. But did he love him back?

"He's just a friend." 

Sangdo hummed, taking a sip from his own drink. 

"Hojoon, I want you to know nothing like that will ever happen to you here. You're safe here, and if anything happens, anything at all, you tell me, okay?"

Hojoon's head fell back against the leather sofa as he looked over at Sangdo. He never expected the owner of a strip club to be so compassionate, so caring. He genuinely cared about the well-being of all of his staff, he treated them like actual human beings, not just money making whores. 

"Thank you." Hojoon whispered. He hadn't realised how attractive the dark haired man was. Strong jawline, golden skin, gorgeous smile. 

He leaned closer to Sangdo, capturing his manager's lips in his own, arms wrapping around the taller man's neck as he pulled himself deeper into the kiss. He moaned lightly as Sangdo kissed him back, shifting slightly so he was in the elder's lap. His hand snaked down to palm Sangdo through his jeans. 

"Do you wanna fuck me?" He purred into Sangdo's ear, rutting against his bosses thigh. "I'll do anything you want me to."

"Hojoon... You're drunk; you don't know what you're doing."

Sangdo pulled away, pushing Hojoon softly so the blonde was sitting back on the sofa instead of in his lap. 

"I meant it when I said things are different here. You don't have to repay me with sex."

Hojoon felt his face heat up. "Sangdo that's not what I- I thought that maybe you wanted me to." He dug the heels of his palms into his eyes, stopping the tears from streaming down his face. "Fuck. I'm sorry. I know you aren't like that I just... Sex is how I deal with things. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Hojoon, it's fine, really. Let me take you home."

"No, it's fine, I've embarrassed myself enough, I'll just go." He tried to stand, falling back into the sofa as the room spun around him. 

Sangdo sighed; helping him up, hooking an arm around the smaller boy's waist he led him to his car. 

Hojoon groaned as he leaned against the car window. He is head was banging. 

"Am I gonna get sacked for this?"

"Of course not. Just don't make a habit of getting drunk at work and coming onto me." Sangdo laughed under his breath as he turned a corner. 

Hojoon groaned louder, dragging his hands down his face. "I'm so sorry. It won't happen again, I promise."

"Don't worry about it, seriously."

Hojoon directed Sangdo through the streets of Camden back to Jiho's place. It didn't even cross his mind that it the first place he thought of going. 

"Uh...Sangdo? Thanks for not like, uhm, raping me or whatever. I'm so fucking drunk I can barely even see straight nevermind...consent and stuff."

Sangdo's heart clenched at the fact Hojoon was thanking him for not taking advantage of him. That the blonde was so used to men having their way with him he thought that not raping someone needed commending. 

"Will you be okay tonight? Do you live with someone you can talk to?"

Hojoon nodded, pulling his hoodie tighter around himself. "My boyfriend...and his boyfriends." Sangdo quirked an eyebrow making the dancer laugh. "Don't even ask."

They pulled up outside Jiho's apartment, Hojoon thanked Sangdo, trying to make his way out of the car but not quite managing to figure out how the door worked. 

Sangdo unlocked his own door, walking around the car to help Hojoon out and guiding him up the steps to his front door. The blonde was swaying behind him as he rang the doorbell, forehead resting against Sangdo's back. 

A short brunette opened the door, rubbing his eyes. They had probably woke him up, it was after 2am. 

"Aren't you Hojoon's boss?"

"Yeah, I brought him home, he's kinda-"

"Tae!" 

The blonde pushed past him, wrapping his arms around the brunette's shoulders and planting a messy kiss on his lips. Sangdo smiled, assuming this must be Hojoon's boyfriend. 

Taeyang pulled back, breaking the kiss. "You taste like gin." The brunette frowned, taking a closer look at his boyfriend. "What's with your eyes? Have you been...?"

Taeyang's face fell, realising Hojoon had been doing more than just drinking. He unhooked the dancer's arms from around his neck. 

"Jiho!" A tall boy with bright red hair appeared behind Taeyang. "Can you...deal with this? He's off his face; I don't know what he's taken."

"...Tae?" 

Taeyang took off down the hallway, passing a concerned looking Hansol and Byungjoo before disappearing into his room. 

Hojoon's eyes began to fill up again as he moved to follow his boyfriend, not understanding why Taeyang was so mad at him. He'd just had the worst night in six months and the person he needed most was abandoning him. 

"Let him go, honey." Jiho wrapped his arms around the blonde, stopping him from going after Taeyang. "You can stay with me tonight." 

Hojoon whined, he had no idea what was happening, the drugs and alcohol in his system weren't helping, as he sunk into Jiho's shirt, sobbing quietly. 

"Thanks for bringing him home safe." Jiho smiled at Sangdo, running his fingers through honey blonde hair. 

"No problem. He might be a little freaked out in the morning when this is all out of his system. Jiwon came to see him tonight."

Jiho froze. "Jiwon? He didn't...hurt him, did he?"

Sangdo shook his head. "Security got him out of there pretty quick, he's been banned from the premises so you know Hojoon's gonna be safe there. Tell him to take the test of the week off; I'll see him on Monday if he's feeling better." 

Jiho thanked Sangdo again as the elder left to go back to his car. Hojoon was still crying into his shirt, he picked the blonde up, figuring he would barely be able to walk as he carried him to his bedroom. 

"Does Taeyang hate me?" Hojoon sniffled as he curled up in Jiho's bed, arms wrapped around a pillow. 

"Of course doesn't." Jiho reassured him, lying down so he was facing the elder. "He's just not good around alcohol and...drugs. Give him a little space and he'll be fine. He's not mad at you or anything."

Hojoon nodded, shuffling closer to Jiho, prompting the redhead to wrap his arms around Hojoon's slight frame. "Sorry I'm such a fuck up."

"You have nothing to apologise for, Princess." Jiho pressed a kiss into his hair. "Just get some sleep and we'll talk in the morning."

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Hojoon woke up with a pair of arms wrapped around his waist and a dull throbbing in his head, right above his eyebrows. This brought back way too many memories he had tried to suppress. He prayed to God the guy next to him wasn't completely repulsive. 

_Jiho?_

He hadn't even registered that he was in the model's room. 

Jiho was already awake pointing towards the bedside table. "There's water and painkillers on there for you." 

Hojoon uttered a small _'thank you'_ as he took the pills in his hand, memories of last night crashing down on him as his nose ran a little. What the fuck had he taken? 

He lay back down beside Jiho after swallowing the tablets, massaging his fingers into his temples in an attempt to alleviate the pain. 

"How are you feeling?"

"My head's fucking killing me."

"I meant about what happened last night."

Hojoon raised an eyebrow.  _What happened last night?_   _Oh fuck, Jiwon_. He slid back down under the covers, inching closer to the redhead. 

"I was so fucking scared, Jiho. I didn't know what he was going to do to me, why he was there. It felt like I was back at square one, like he was controlling me again. And then he touched me and I..." He took a shaky breath, trying to force the tears back down. "Then he kept talking about you and I just, like, snapped out of it. I remembered he doesn't own me anymore, that you saved me from him and I didn't even want to hear your name come from his lips. So I called security and they took him away." 

He smiled to himself as he remembered the look on Jiwon's face as he was dragged out of the building. "It really shook me up though, seeing him after so long."

Jiho hummed, wiping a single stray tear from Hojoon's cheekbone. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there to protect you. I promised he'd never hurt you again."

The blonde shook his head. "Don't be. It's not your fault." He sniffled into Jiho's chest, taking a larger hand in his own, thumb ghosting over the ring on his middle finger. He could tell just from the feel that it was Taeyang's ring. 

"Is Tae alright?"

Jiho wrapped his other arm around Hojoon, protectively pulling the smaller boy even closer into his chest. 

"He's fine; he said he'd see in a bit. He feels terrible for leaving you when you were so upset but he just can't be around stuff like that. I'm sure he'll tell you why when he gets back. He went out to get you something for breakfast."

Hojoon had always found it weird that they never went out drinking together or even had a couple of beers in the house. Now that he thought about it he had never seen any of them drunk.

"I didn't mean to freak him out, I don't know what I was thinking even taking that stuff. I just wanted Jiwon out of my head." 

"Everyone deals with stuff in different ways; Taeyang understands that better than anyone. Just remember you're not alone, Hojoon, you don't have to deal with it on your own anymore."

Hojoon knew that. He should have just rang Taeyang or Jiho as soon as it happened instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with his manager. 

The two of them lay there in silence, just enjoying each other's company. Jiho was on the verge nodding back off before Hojoon spoke up. 

"Jiho, do you love me?"

Jiho cracked open an eye, looking down at the blonde bundle in his arms. "Yeah. I do."

"Like, how you love Tae and Hansol or like as a friend?"

"Like, I'm  _in_  love with you, Hojoon. I always have been. I never used to believe in love at first sight, but I guess you changed that."

Hojoon shifted uncomfortably as Jiho's words set off the butterflies in his stomach. He still hated that feeling. He always knew Jiho loved him to some extent, but he figured Jiho was the type of person that loved all of his friends. He felt slightly guilty that Jiho had been so deeply in love with him for so long and Hojoon had refused to acknowledge it. That every time they had slept together Jiho had been making love to him, whereas Hojoon had just wanted to be fucked. 

Or at least that's what he told himself. The idea of being in love had always terrified him, mainly because he never thought anyone would reciprocate it. Taeyang had proven him wrong. He loved Taeyang and he loved  _being with_  Taeyang. 

This love thing wasn't as scary as he initially thought. 

"I love you too." Hojoon raised himself up on his elbow to lean down and kiss Jiho. 

"Really?" Jiho breathed against Hojoon's lips as they parted. 

"Yeah...you were the first person I thought about last night, and I felt safe even though you weren't there. I knew Jiwon couldn't hurt me anymore because I have you and Taeyang. I love you both so much, it just took me forever to realise it. I think I was scared of loving you back in case I wasn't good enough for you or something."

He pressed another tender kiss to Jiho's lips, his hand snaking under the redheads t-shirt to rub soothing circles into his sharp hipbone. "But after last night I've realised how much you mean to me. I got so mad when he spoke about you. I don't want to be without you any longer, I love you, Jiho."

Jiho's face split into a wide grin before pulling Hojoon down on top of him into a deeper kiss, fingers carding through sandy blonde hair as their tongues moved fluidly against one another. 

"Does this mean you'll move in with us, like, officially?"

Hojoon whined. Saying  _'I love you'_  was one thing, but he wasn't sure he was ready for that kind of commitment. He probably would have said yes to officially moving into their little apartment, he pretty much lived there anyway. But moving into  _a real house_  they Jiho and Taeyang actually  _owned_  like  _real adults_  with a mortgage and everything was totally different. 

"I dunno that's a pretty big step."

Jiho rolled his eyes. "Babe, you basically live with us anyway, you're just throwing money away on that other place."

Hojoon hummed. He did hate his apartment, and he couldn't really stand his roommate, and he was paying a lot considering he was never there. But he liked the fact he had somewhere of his own whenever this got too much for him. He was worried that being around Jiho and Taeyang 24/7 would put a strain on their relationship. 

"The place we've put a deposit on has seven bedrooms, that's more than enough space if you ever feel like you need to escape. I get that you're not like me and Hansol; we both thrive off of human interaction. But you aren't like that, and we'll respect that just like we do with Taeyang."

"Plus." Jiho added, stroking his fingers up and down Hojoon's forearm. "We're gonna be so much further away from you if you don't come and I'll miss you. So will Tae and Hansol. We'd be like a proper little family if you came with us." 

Jiho felt Hojoon tense up in his arms. He had gone too far, he knew how flighty and scared of commitment the blonde was, he should never have used a word as strong as family around him. 

"Family?" Hojoon's voice was small, it made Jiho's breath hitch, an apology on the tip of his tongue. "I've never had a family before." 

Jiho's heart sunk at the tone of Hojoon's voice. The elder had never really spoken about his life before moving to London, Jiho had just assumed he didn't speak to his parents, he had never once mentioned them. Maybe he didn't even have parents. 

"Really?" The redhead wanted Hojoon to open up, he could tell the dancer bottled a lot of stuff up which wasn't healthy, but he didn't want to pry or make him uncomfortable. "What was your childhood like? I don't know anything about you before your twenties."

"That's cause I try not to think about it too much." Hojoon cuddled into Jiho's side, hooking his leg over one of the younger's longer ones. He hated this time of year, it was far too cold. 

"My parents never wanted me, never planned on having kids. I was always a mistake, but they were pretty religious so they couldn't get rid of me. They moved me around a lot because of their jobs. I never had a real home or friends cause I was never in one place long enough."

His eyes fell shut as Jiho's fingers scraped against his scalp soothingly. 

"My father was really strict, he'd hit me or lock me in a closet if I did anything wrong. Which I did, a lot, I was kind of a dick at school. Probably an attention seeking thing. And my mother didn't care enough to stop him."

Jiho pulled Hojoon into a tighter hug, pressing soft kisses to the elder’s forehead, reassuring him it was okay to continue. 

"By the time I was sixteen I'd had enough. I ran away from home, came to London. I stole a load of money from them to buy my plane ticket and rent a place for a few months. They never sent the police after me or anything. They were probably glad I was out of their lives."

The blonde tensed up again, his nails lightly scratching patterns into Jiho's skin. "I thought moving to London would be a fresh start, like a city of dreams or some bullshit. But it wasn't that easy for me to get a job. I was just a kid with hardly any qualifications, that's how I got into drug dealing. I ended up stealing a load of stuff from Jiwon to try and sell myself, without giving him a cut." He laughed bitterly. "And you know how that turned out."

Jiho hated that Hojoon's life had been so difficult, that he had to suffer alone for so long. 

"I've never actually told anyone that before. No one's ever cared enough about me to ask." 

"Well, you don't have to feel like that anymore. You have three people that love and care about you now."

"You, Tae and Hansol are the closest thing I've ever had to a family. If I do move in..." He could feel Jiho getting excited at the idea; the younger wrapped his arms tighter around Hojoon, rocking the smaller boy back and forth. "I said  _if_. I'm still paying rent."

Jiho scoffed. "I'm buying this house so I can look after you guys."

"You look after me enough, you've done so much for me Jiho, at least let me contribute. Or I'm not moving in and I'm only gonna visit Taeyang. I'll just ignore you when I come over."

Jiho whined an  _'okay, fine'_  as Hojoon smiled to himself; it didn't take much more than a few idle threats for Jiho to give in. 

"Plus, I want a good room, one of the ones with lots of outside light and a balcony. And I want like, a huge queen sized bed so you and Tae can sleep in it at the same time. And I've already picked out the wallpaper I want for my feature wall. We are re-decorating, right? Cause I absolutely hate the colour the living room is at the moment, like, that needs to be changed ASAP. Oh, and, since we have seven rooms, can I have one as like a walk-in-wardrobe-stroke-dressing room? I can practice my dance routines in there too. And. I think we should get a puppy cause you guys all work during the day and I work at night so I'll be bored and lonely. But like a little, cute dog not one of those big ones that'll get saliva everywhere. Also, can Hansol's room be as far away from mine as possible? I don't wanna hear him banging Byungjoo, because, they’re totally gonna bang eventually and that's gross."

Jiho laughed to himself at Hojoon's list of demands, pressing a kiss to the blonde's lips. "I knew there was a reason I call you Princess." 

 

✧ ✦ ✧

 

Jiho kicked his boots off. He needed his bed ASAP. He had been shooting since 5am for a commercial clip that would probably be no more than twenty seconds. 

"Tae?! Joon?!" He called for his boyfriends, knowing Hansol was out with his friends tonight. No answer. They must already be asleep. 

He was so tired, pulling his sweater over his head as he entered his bedroom. 

"Welcome home, baby."

He removed the item of clothing from over his eyes to reveal Hojoon on his bed, straddling Taeyang. 

"Sit." The dancer commanded, patting the space on the king size bed beside them. 

Hojoon bit his lip as Jiho joined them, grinding his hips slightly, eliciting a soft moan from Taeyang. He didn't break eye contact with Jiho once. 

"You've never seen me ride dick from this angle before. I look good, right?" He arched his back, rocking himself on Taeyang's cock, eyes fluttering shut at the sensation of the elder being inside him. 

"Hojoon, move." Taeyang gasped out, trying to buck his hips up into the blonde. 

Hojoon smirked, pressing wet kisses down Taeyang's neck and chest, keeping his eyes fixed on Jiho. "Has he always been this demanding? He's even more of a Princess than I am."

Jiho chuckled at the nickname, remembering the first, and last, time he had tried calling Taeyang that. 

Hojoon picked up a rhythm, his hands flat on Taeyang's stomach to balance himself as he rode the elder. 

Taeyang and Hojoon were both so loud in bed; Jiho loved it, he could get off just from listening to his boyfriends fuck each other. 

Taeyang threw his head back against the pillow, his hand reaching out for Jiho as Hojoon moved his hips more vigorously. 

_"Hyung..."_

Jiho's stomach twisted as the word left Taeyang's lips, instantly leaning over to kiss his boyfriend. 

"Hyung?"

Taeyang whined into Jiho's mouth has Hojoon slowed his hips. 

"Do you have a daddy kink, Jiho?"

The redhead pulled away from his boyfriend, looking at the honey-blonde with a look of disgust on his face. 

Hojoon smirked. "I think your  _dongsaeng_  wants you to fuck him." He teased, rolling his hips, eliciting a moan from a disgruntled Taeyang. 

He looked down at the elder, picking his pace back up as Jiho positioned himself between Taeyang's legs, pushing a spit-slicked finger into his entrance. Hojoon loved that he was still learning new things about the couple. 

"Tae, you ready, baby?" Jiho spoke from behind the dancer, slipping his fingers out of Taeyang's stretched hole. 

Taeyang whimpered at the loss, Hojoon still bouncing on top of him. "Jiho, just...fucking do it." 

"Fuck him,  _hyungnim_." He smirked, emphasising the honorific. "He wants you so bad."

Jiho slapped Hojoon's thigh lightly, holding onto the dancers hips to help guide him into Taeyang. 

The brunette cried out, fingernails digging into Hojoon's thighs as the pleasure hit him twofold. Jiho slipped into a steady rhythm that matched Hojoon's, fucking into him as his other boyfriend rode him. He felt like he was going to explode. Taeyang thanked some higher power that they weren't still in their shitty Camden apartment; their retired neighbour would have been over to complain by now. Having a detached house was a Godsend. 

"Jiho...Hojoon...More!"

Taeyang's words were coming out in a garbled mess, his head was spinning, but he knew he wanted more from the both of them. He was so close, just needing that little bit extra to tip him over the edge. 

Jiho spread the brunette's legs a little more, shifting his angle slightly so he could reach Taeyang's sweet spot. Hojoon's movements were getting more erratic, the blonde close to his own orgasm. He continued his assault on Taeyang's prostate, pounding into the elder as he reached around the blonde to stroke his erection. 

Taeyang came with a strangled scream, back arching as he bucked into Hojoon, filling the blonde. Hojoon came seconds later, head falling back against Jiho's shoulder as he erupted in the younger's hand. 

"You're both so gorgeous." Jiho whispered into Hojoon's ear, loud enough for Taeyang to hear as he rutted into the brunette, reaching his own climax. 

He wrapped his arms around Hojoon's waist, the elder falling back against him as orgasm rippled through the three of them. 

"Fuck." Hojoon turned to catch Jiho's lips in his own before rolling off of Taeyang and lying down next to the elder. "You two are my favourite people ever." He left a trail of soothing kisses along Taeyang's collarbones; the brunette was barely responsive, sleep taking over his worn body. 

Jiho set about cleaning his boyfriends up, placing a gentle kiss on each of their foreheads. "I love you both so much." 

Taeyang hummed, too tired to say the words back to his boyfriend, knowing he didn't need to say them aloud, Jiho already knew. 

Hojoon felt a warmth sweeping over him, a playful smile creeping into his face. "We love you too,  _daddy_."

Taeyang groaned, slapping Hojoon on the chest as he curled into the younger's side. "Call him that again and I'll kick your ass."

Hojoon cackled. "I can't believe you call him hyung."

Taeyang slapped him again, harder this time. "Shut the fuck up. I like older guys, okay."

Hojoon laughed slightly louder, wrapping his arms around the brunette, mainly to prevent Taeyang from hitting him again. "You have three boyfriends that are younger than you."

"Shhhhhh. Shh." Taeyang tried to silence Hojoon by putting a finger to the blonde's lips, or trying to; jabbing the younger in the nose because he couldn't be bothered to open his eyes. "Sleep time."

He reached around behind him, feeling for his crimson haired boyfriend. "Bambi. Sleep time."

The model laughed gently. "Hansol will be back soon, I'll wait up for him. You two rest." He pulled a blanket over his smaller boyfriends, pressing another kiss to Hojoon's lips and Taeyang's cheek; the elder had already passed out in Hojoon's arms. 

Hojoon buried his face in Taeyang's hair; the brunette's breath was steady on his chest, arm thrown across Hojoon's waist, mumbling incoherently in his sleep. 

"Love you, Joon." Jiho whispered from the door of his bedroom as he left to go wait for Hansol. 

Hojoon sighed contentedly. "Love you too, Jiho."

He was finally home. 


End file.
